Billionaire's little addiction

Chapter 26

"We would be a big family Bianca" he whispered

I looked at him confused, not knowing what he meant, if he meant that he doesn't mind, or if he meant that my family won't mind, I don't understand

"What..do you mean" I said lower than a whisper

"I mean that, if you got pregnant, and if you don't want to abort it then I will take the kid, we would get married, and we will be a big family Bianca, we are in this together" he said while he took my hand to his mouth and pecked it

"Why?" tears started pouring hard, is all of this out of pity? Does he feel guilt towards me?

"Because..." he started, but then he stopped, I realized we are at my parent's house, My house

I waited some more for an answer, but I knew none will come, I felt my heart being heavy, it is out of pity then? I couldn't take the idea of me being weak again, I just opened the door and left quickly without a word, I knocked the door and seconds later I was pulled in by our Maid Ruby

Ruby is a little shorter than me, she is basically a red head with big brown eyes, she worked for us for years, and she has become my close friend

"Bcan, it is gonna be alright" she whispered while pulled me into a hug, I cried ever harder than before if that was actually possible (yes her nickname is bcan, no it isn't a typo)

I didn't feel good, I wanted to open up, my chest was so heavy and it hurts more mentally, I decided I would open my heart and soul out and tell her and my sisters everything

~~~~~~~~

After I had told them everything, we decided to just rest and watch the notebook

I saw all of them were sobbing like crazy with me, which kinda was funny, it made me laugh a little, they are ugly criers and I couldn't help but giggle

And you know that moment when you are so tired so you laugh so hard, for no reason, well that was what was happening to me right now

But it still hurts, I am laughing through the pain, because it hurts, and I don't like it, I just wanna cry and laugh and just roll in a blanket and die

I don't know

I don't know how I feel

I don't know why it is happening to me

And the chuckles that was once because of my laughing, became sobs, heavy dark sobs

They were like dark waves from my heart, that was transferring the pain to the outside hoping it would ease it

But nothing

It was so painful

I don't know what is happening to me

Was it my fault

Was I the one that make people hurt me

I probably deserve it dont i?

I do.

Iam such a bad person

A waste of space and time and money

Waste of food and water

....A waste of breathing

I probably don't even deserve the oxygen I am breathing

I should not be living

I
Am
Not
Meant
To
Live

I laid my head on my knees, my sisters and ruby where hugging me tightly, but I just cried more

"Go please" I said under a whisper

I didn't want them to see me like this

I don't deserve their pity and love

I am a waste

A mistake

Lethal

And

Useless

I decided to close my eyes, and just sleep
~~~~~~~~~~~
I know I know this so freakin short and you deserve more but pleaseeeee bare with me I have been having a wild writer block and I might even not know how to continue this story for a while but I am really trying hard and I also have another book I am gonna publish soon so please be Patient It's comingggg