My Life As a Teenage Zombie

Mind Games

Damien's funeral comes a lot faster than my mother's, and I'm waiting for Mason to pick me up. It's only Wednesday, and I'm already exhausted. Daniel really won't be the same again. He's not been right in the head at all, mumbling to himself the entire time. He's a lot faster and stronger than before, going all around town within seconds, saying insane stuff, claiming to be looking for Damien. We only managed to get him to accept his death yesterday.

"You're lying," he told us. "He's just hiding somewhere. You're being silly."

It was the most painful conversation of my life. Mason couldn't convince him, but I managed to, using my mother to do so, telling him how I had to come to terms with her death on my own time, too. That was a half-truth, since I don't miss my mother at all, and he'll likely never love anyone as much as he loved his brother.

Henry pokes his head into my room. "He's here."

I nod, then follow him downstairs. He's wearing some of Mason's black clothes, since Derek didn't have any. They're ridiculously big on him. Damien's would've fit better, but I'm not about to ask for that. Not now, and not ever. We walk outside, where Mason and Serena are waiting in her car. The drive is a silent one. I don't know what to say to them. I've never lost someone I cared about, and now they've both lost a friend.

"Where's Daniel?" I ask instead, not wanting to say the wrong thing about their feelings, which I'm having trouble predicting and understanding. What's it like to miss someone? Not the way I miss Derek, but the way you miss them while knowing their return is an impossibility.

"Savannah will get him there," Serena tells me, being a lot more in control of her face than Mason, whose eyes are completely read. I don't touch him; I just sit close. He's not looking anyone in the eye, and I don't think it's just embarrassment at his display of sadness, which is a new level for him. It's more like he just... can't. It's some kind of emotional response for him to be unemotional. I haven't pried deep enough yet to know what it's about. Something to do with his dad? Well, I'll learn in due time. I hope.

We reach the site of the funeral, and there are a great many people there already. I've never been to one before, so I'm not sure what to do. I just follow after Mason, sticking close in case he needs me. Simon and his family are there, which means he can't even look at me.

I don't listen to Mr. Stash as he gives some words. Almost no one does, from the looks on their faces.

(One of mine for one of yours. It only seems fair.)

Not now. Why does he have the worst timing?

(Piss off.)

(No need to be rude. I'm here to offer you an easier solution.)

I know I should just stay quiet, keep a low profile, and get on with this day without being at the center of it for once, but that offer sounds too good to refuse. I look at Henry, who seems to have noticed something is off, then shake my head at him. He nods, showing his understanding.

(Get on with it. I'm kind of busy.)

He chuckles through my head, which gives me a slight headache. (Three of mine against three of you. Have Henry choose the battlefield, ensuring I won't be there to interfere directly. If you win, I'll back off forever. If they win, your heart belongs to me.)

"Picture a wall in your mind," Henry whispers. "Do that, and he won't be able to read you."

I do just that, and my line of thought continues. John is full of shit, of course. Not only is it likely to be a trap - I don't trust that there'll be only three of them - but he has no reason to obey me even if I win. I should just tell him to fuck off.