If Only You Knew...

Chapter 6

I remembered being pushed out the party, I was yelling and cussing..

"Chill yo ass out mane!" Cameron yelled. "And who the fuck you talking to! That bitch approached me because yo ass let her slide.. get yo fucking hands off me.." I shrugged him off before I went to the car with my girls.

"Girl, I didn't know you was throwing like that." I shook my head. "Not sum I'm proud of." I looked out the window.

I'm sorry momma.

I shut my eyes, and just calmed down. It was a little too late now but, I needed too.

"Waffle House?" I heard Mandy, "well run me home.." I sat up. They looked back at me. "I said run me home, I'll cash app you the gas." I rolled my eyes.

I got out the car, and walked slowly into the house, I kicked my feet, and when I came to the front door, I didn't even wanna go in.

I sat on the porch. Headlights pulled in and I got up.

I only heard one door, and I coulda sworn they were together. "Wassup sis?" Aaron walked up. "You ight? You look stressed.." I nodded while tears swelled in my eyes.

"What's wrong?" He asked again and I just broke down. "I let my mama down.." I cried harder once admitting it.

"I'm so sorry..." I cried.

"Sis, what happened? You had sex?!" He pushed me and held me by the shoulders. "Nooooo. I got into a fight and I blacked out." I sniffled. "Something small, okay sis. Come on." He led the way into the house.

We walked in, and all you heard was MOANING..

I looked at Aaron. "Better yet, let's go get some food." I was enraged. I stomped up the stairs, and pushed the door open.

They both looked like they saw ghost.

"You fucking disgusting piece of shit!" I yelled before storming out. Not even looking at them really...

I walked downstairs.. I grabbed my shit and my keys and I left. My mad hadn't been gone two years and he was over her.

I was enraged. I sped going wherever the truck took me.

I ended up at my moms gravesite. I curled up on the grass. I didn't know I had fell asleep until I heard "ma'am." I woke up and mugged the guy. "Are you okay?" He asked. "Yea I'm fine." I got up and walked to my car. "Ma'am!" He called out. "You didn't have to leave!" I climbed in my truck.

I need you mama, I need you so bad.

I started my truck and pulled off. It was going on 4:45 AM, I pulled into the garage. I sat there. The garage door opened.

"Damn. You can't just run off like that." Aaron opened my door. "Got his ass in there stressed." I looked at him and got out. I walked past him.

"What's wrong?" He followed me.

I walked through the house and to my room. I had times where I'd go mute. It was nothing new, to myself.

I went upstairs and his door opened. "I'm sorry princess.. I -.." he got cut off by my door slamming and locking. He moved on.. I think that hurt more than anything.

I went and got in the bathtub. I looked at the scars inside my thigh. I shook my head, no. I sat back and just relaxed.

My mind went to my mom.

Man she was beautiful. Then my mind shifted to my dad.

Then it shifted to the woman he had in the bed.

I shook my head as my head started to hurt.

Before I knew it, I woke up in my bed, two taps on my door. I got up and opened it. It was a letter.

Princess,

Look I'm sorry, I know bringing her here was wrong and shit, but you can't expect me to be sad forever, whenever you want to.. you can meet my girlfriend of a year.. her name is Farrah.

I ripped it up. I grabbed a sheet of paper.

I wrote on it. Hmmm, seems like Slut has been around longer than my moms been gone considering you've been together a year and my moms been gone for a year and a half. You don't start just DATING once meeting.

I went to his room and slid it under his door.

I went downstairs and Aaron, Slut, and my dad were eating together. "Hey, Farrah made breakfast." My dad smiled. I looked at him, turned my lip up.. I looked at her and did the same.

I shook my head and walked out. I think I have a decision made.