Hidden Truths

Chapter 11

A/N the following chapters will be from Alex's POV

Sam's behaviour has been really crazy recently. Like so crazy it's almost surreal. Is she even the same Sam? It's quite hard to tell when she's been keeping secrets.

I think I should be concerned, but how can I be when I don't know what's going on? Yeah, I know I sound heartless. But whatever. I don't really care anymore.

"Hey Alex. Happy birthday." It's Jacob.

"Hey and thanks." I couldn't care less that it's my birthday.

"Whatcha doing?"

"Don't know."

"Let's go to your house and play PS4."

"Okay."

My house is awfully quiet. I think Sam is upstairs or out. Most likely she's gone out. Oh well, at least me and Jacob have the place to ourselves.

"So what d'you want to play?" I ask Jacob.

"Erm... I don't know."

"You choose something. I just have to go do something quickly."

"Cool."

I go upstairs and notice the door to Sam's room is open. That's weird, it's never open. I think now is a good time to be concerned. Her room is empty but I see something on her desk.

Two sheets of paper. One of them has my name on it. I open it. It's a letter from Sam. This can't be good. I read it.

Alex,

I'm so sorry. I know you must be confused right now but if you're reading this, everything will soon make sense to you. The thing is, I haven't been completely honest with you. Or anyone actually. But you deserve to know the truth so I'll tell you.

It started on my fifteenth birthday. I did something, something terrible that I've been regretting the past twenty-eight months. At first I thought I could get away with it. Remember when I told you that mum went missing? Well, I lied.

She didn't go missing. I'm not going to sugar-coat it. Let me just tell you.

I killed her.

I'm a murderer Alex. And I don't expect you to forgive me. Don't try to find excuses, just accept it.

Your sister is a killer.

I'm a bad person. Worse than Dad. Let me list you all my sins:

Murdering an innocent person

Lying about it

Keeping it from you

I'm so sorry. I should've told you ages ago but I was scared. I thought you'd hate me. That fear seems pathetic now. You probably hate me more. I mean I hate myself so it would make sense for everyone else to.

You know CRMG? Well I deserve everything he has done and will do to me. He's justified in punishing me. If you want to know anything else, read my diary. After that, burn it. You don't need a constant reminder of the past.

Oh yeah, one final request from me. You're never going to see me again so don't come looking for me. Please.

The further you stay away the safer you'll be. You deserve a safe and happy life and if you're with me, I can't give you protection or happiness.

Not when everything is my fault. Not when I'm the danger.

I regret everything. I really do. But I can't forgive myself. I won't forgive myself. I don't deserve forgiveness. So don't forgive me Alex. Don't pretend that everything is okay. Because it's not. I don't think it ever will be.

Don't show this to anyone. In fact when you're done, burn it. Just burn everything that's mine and remove me from your life. It'll be better that way.

Please Alex, don't come after me. Also happy birthday.

Samantha