Philip and Theodosia (West Side Story x Hamilton)

Part 1

"Break it up, you guys! Cut it out!", Alexander said, prying the boys off of each other, "Come on, guys! Break it up, I said!". When he got the Federalist kids and the Dem-Rep kids separated into their respective groups, he said "How many times have I told you guys to cut this stuff out?!". Then William said "Well, if it ain't Alexander Hamilton, himself!", then the Federalist kids said "Top of the day, Mr. Hamilton!". "And John Adams," said Aaron, then the Dem-Rep kids said  "Top of the day,  Mr. Adams!", to which Adams replied "I'll give you the top of the head!". Hamilton said to the two Federalist kids hanging on the fence, "Hey, you! Get down!", to which one kid said "But we're having such fun! We enjoy the playground!". William continued, "See, it keeps us teens off the foul city streets," to which Adams told him to shut up. Another Federalist kid continued, "And born like we was on the hot pavement," "You wanna get your skull broke?" asked Adams.

"Hey, John, come here", Hamilton said to John King. He then made him face the Dem-Rep kids. "All right! Now which one of those Democratic Republicans bloodied you? Huh?" "Well, sir, uh..." "Which one?!". William then came to Hamilton and said "Excuse me, sir, as a matter of fact, we suspicion the job was done by a politician! Two at the very least!", and Adams said "Impossible!". Aaron then said "In New York, nothing is impossible,".

Hamilton then said "All right, wise guys, now you listen to me. All of you! You guys don't own the streets! And I've had all the roughhouse I'm gonna put up around here! You wanna kill each other, kill each other! But you ain't gonna do it on my beat. Are we clear?", to which everyone said "Yes, sir". Hamilton said to Aaron "Get your... friends out of here, Aaron! And stay out! Please,". Aaron said "Okay, 'Reps. Let's go," and then the Dem-Rep kids left.

"Boy, oh boy" said Hamilton to himself "As if this neighborhood wasn't crummy enough," then he turned his attention to the Federalist kids.

"Now look, fellas, fellas? Look, let's be reasonable. If I don't get a little law and order around here, I get busted down to be Washington's secretary. And your friend don't like being a secretary. So that means you're gonna start making nice with the Dem-Reps from now on. 'Cause if you don't, and I catch any of you doing any more brawling in the streets, I'm gonna personally beat the living crud out of every one of you, and see that you go to the can to rot there. Say good bye to the nice boys, Adams," he then said. "Good bye, boys!" said Adams. Then they went off.

"Jail? Gee!" said John. Several of the Federalist kids began mocking the two politicians. "You guys don't own the streets!" "Go play in the park" "Keep off of the grass!" "Get out of the house!" "Keep off the block!" "Keep off the world!" "A group that own a street is NOTHING!" Thomas Marshall said. "We DO own it!" William said "Come on, Feds, round out! Not you, Sarah, beat it!". Sarah Jay was William's little sister who wanted to be with the group. "Aw, Will, you gotta let me be in the gang! Didn't you just see me? I was smash, I was killer! I wanna fight!" to which one of the guys said "How else is she gonna get a guy to touch her?", and that made everyone laugh. "You dirty rat!" Sarah said "Come on, the road, little girl, the road!" John said. "Beat it," William said for the last time. Sarah did so. "Okay, come on," William said.

"Okay, now listen. Now, we fought hard for this turf, and we ain't just gonna give it up! The former Loyalists once claimed it, we knocked them down the cellar," he continued. "Yeah, but these DRs are different! They multiply, like cockroaches!" Thomas said. Everyone agreed. "Shut the doors! Lock the windows! They're breathing all the air!" the Federalist kids said. "Hey, and you heard what Hamilton said. We gotta make nice with them Dem-Reps or else!" William said mockingly. "We gotta let 'em move in right under our noses and take it all away from us or else!" William continued. "NO!" The other kids said. "YOU'RE D--N RIGHT, NO!" William said "So what are we gonna do now, huh, buddy boys? I'll tell you what we're gonna do... We're gonna speed back! We're gonna move like lightnin', and we're gonna clean those Dem-Reps up once and for all, so they ain't NEVER gonna set foot on our turf again! We're gonna do it in one all-out fight." he finished.

"A rumble! Chop-chop!", Thomas said. "Now, cool it, Tommy boy. The 'Reps want a piece of this world, too. And they're real down boys. They might ask for blades, zip guns..." William said, and then John said "Zip guns? Gee.." "Well, I ain't finalizing and saying they will, John. I'm just saying that they might. And we gotta be prepared. Now what's your mood, Feds?" William asked. "I say go, go!", one kid said. "I say mix!" another said. "I say sock 'em! Tear 'em!" a third said.  "Yeah, but if they say blades or guns..." Thomas began, "...I say let's just forget the whole thing!" John said. "What do you say, Will?" Thomas asked. William answered, "I say this turf is small. But it's all we got, huh? I wanna hold it like we always had it... with SKIN. But if they say blades, I say blades. If they say guns, I say guns. I say I want the Feds to be number one! To sail! To hold the sky!". "Then rev us off! Voom va-voom!" A Federalist kid said. Then the Federalist kids exclaimed.

"Okay, cats, we rumble," William said "Now... protocality calls for a war council between us and the Dem-Reps to set the whole thing up. So, I will personally give the bad news to Aaron," "But you gotta take a lieutenant with you. That's me!" Thomas said. "That's Philip", William said. "Who needs Philip?" "We need Philip! He's got a rep that's bigger than the whole city!" William said. "He don't belong no more!" Thomas said. "Now, cut it, Thomas! Me and Philip started this group, plus his father is the leader of the Federalist party," William told him. "Then where is he? How come he takes a lousy stinkin' job?" "Eh, it's temporary sickness. Wait and see," William said.

"Remember them fists they day we clobbered those Loyalists?" Thomas recalled. "Yeah, he saved my ever-lovin' neck," John said. "Sure. He'll do it again through. He always came through for us and he aways will!" William said.

Than he began to sing "When you're a Fed, you're a Fed all the way from your first cigarette to your last dying day. When you're a Fed, let them do what they can. You've got brothers around, you're a family man. You're never alone, you're never disconnected.You're home with your own, when company's expected you're well protected. Then you are set with a capital F which you'll never forget till they cart you away. When you're a Fed, you stay a Fed!",

Then as the group was walking out of the alleyway and into the basketball court, he said "Now I know Philip like I know me, and I guarantee you can count him in," "In, out, let's get crackin'", a Federalist kid said. "Where are you gonna find Aaron? It ain't safe to go in the DR territory!" another one said. "At the dance tonight at the ballroom" "Yeah, but the ballroom is neutral territory!" Thomas said. "Thomas, I'm gonna make nice with him! I'm only gonna challenge him!" William replied. "Great, Daddy-O," a Federalist kid said. "So everybody dress up sweet and sharp. Meet Philip and me at the dance at the ten. And walk tall!" William said. "We always walk tall!" Thomas said "We're Feds!" "The greatest!" John said.

Thomas than began to sing "When you're a Fed, you're the top cat in town. You're the gold-medal kid with the heavyweight crown", and then another Federalist kid sang "When you're a Fed, you're the swingin'est thing! Little boy, you're a man, little man, you're a king!", then all of them sang "The Feds are in gear, our cylinders are clickin'! The 'Reps'll steer clear, 'cause every one of them's just a lousy chicken!" and then they walked to the entrance of the court and sang "Here come the Feds like a bat of of Hell! Someone gets in our way, someone don't feel so well! Here come the Feds, little world, step aside! Better go underground, better run, better hide!  We're drawin' the line, so keep your noses hidden! We're hangin' a sign, says 'Visitors forbidden', and we ain't kiddin!".

Then the Federalist kids all walked out to the street and sang "Here come the Feds, yeah, and we're gonna beat every last buggin' gang on the whole buggin' street! On the whole! Buggin'! Ever! Lovin'! Street!" and they exclaimed "Yeah!"