<I highly recommend leaving while you still can>
I remember the day I was born as if it was yesterday minus 15 years. It was a day like any other. I woke up, and went to work. But before I left I remember the doctors yelling "BEANS AND BRUSSELS SPROUTS". That was pretty neat. I then left for school because I had decided not to go to work. In fact I didn't even have a job.
I fell flat on my face in the middle of the classroom, and the teacher started to cry. "Don't cry" said the mailman, but he threw up, and we all started to cheer. "NO MORE COMMUNISM, NO MORE COMMUNISM". But that was a lie.
•God i hate veggies•
I remember building my first bike, and throwing it off a cliff. It was a strong bike, made out of paper. Before I let it fall out of my hands i yelled: "THE WHOLE NO MORE COMMUNISM THING WAS A LIE." And the majestic creature started it's fall, 49 feet down. But it didn't. It went up, reaching for the stars, and he lives with god now. I'm happy for him, his wife and his children.
•We should build like concentration camps for veggies•
My first friend was a lightbulb. He was pretty nice, I could talk with him for hours about the building process of a piece of ham. I met him in a sewer, when I was looking for my long lost potatoe. "DON'T THROW YOUR POTATO IN THE TOILET!" My father yelled during lunch. But I did. Till this day i still wonder why we had potatoes for lunch. Fucked up household i guess. But yeah, the dude was building a spoon in the sewers and i saw him and i was like: "Nice pants jackass". Apparently he liked that because he started dancing. We cried.
•I swear to god if anyone ever says veggies again i'll rape a chicken•
The first record i ever bought was one of great quality. It was a blue one. I don't remember the band, but i'm sure they spoke chinese. I brought the record home, and smacked my dog. I don't have a dog. The rain was warm when I listened to my first ever record. Wasn't worth it. The sound was way to clingy and green, which i did not expect from a blue record. I ate my hands
YOU ARE READING
The Story I Wrote Because Someone Forced Me To And Threatened To Rape My Door
SpiritualI don't know how this works @QueenIcyChelsea help me I guess it's not really a story it's more like a combination of gibberish and hate towards vegetables The story cover is Michelangelo because he was a genius just like me.
