RYDA

Never Satisfied

"Chanel I gotta go" I hear a deep voice say. As the person was talking, their voice filled my ears. Have you ever just woke up and not know where you were, yeah that's me right now. Nearly a split second passed and I realized that it was only Xavier. I groan and just began to doze back off again. "I gotta go make a drop" Xavier says shaking me trying to wake me up.

"Nooo come cuddle with me" I whine still laying on him.  I wrap my arms around him holding him tightly.

"I can't I need this money"

I smack my lips and sit up rubbing my eyes. "I'll come back. I promise" He says as he kissed my lips.

It was completely dark in the room except the little light from the tv asking if we were still watching it and the little light managing to come in through the closed curtains. I got up from the couch and stumbled my way over to the light to turn it on, I'm like a drunk person when I first wake up I have no idea why.

"What time is it?" I ask him rubbing my eyes.

"Almost 4" He responds standing up from the couch. Damn, I practically just went to sleep.  We both began to walk over to the door then I unlocked it and opened it for him.

"Gimme your keys so I can get back in" He tells. I grab them off the table and then hand it over to him.

"I'll be right back" He tells me before leaving out the house. I lock the front door before walking over to turn off the tv. I fixed the couch pillows and grabbed my phone. I turned off the living room light and darted upstairs to my bedroom. I plopped down on the bed and as soon as my head touched a pillow I was out like a light.

The sun beamed into the room coaxing me from my sleep. I buried my face into my pillow trying to go back to sleep. I got up and closed the curtains and got back into bed. I looked over and Xavier was sound asleep taking all the covers.

"X" I tried to pull some over to my side of the bed but it wouldn't budge. "Xavier"

"Shhh" He replies.

"Gimme some damn cover" I say snatching it.

"You keep taking it all." He tugs on it pulling most of it back to his side.

"Stop playing" I roll over taking the covers with me.

Every time we spend the night with each other we always end up arguing with each other either in the morning or fighting over the cover. It never fails.

"Chanel g I'm finna beat yo ass" I could feel him sit up and I tried my best not to laugh and pretend like I was already falling asleep again. He pulls me over to him laying my head on his chest then puts the cover over the both of us.

That was the night I fell in love with him. I never imagined myself falling this hard for him, but I did. I never even imagined neither one of us settling down, yet alone with each other.

I stared in the mirror trying to calm myself down. I looked down at the countertop at the pregnancy test. My mind was racing and I knew there was no way in hell. I ran my fingers through my hair and tucked in my shirt. "You ready?" My mom asks peaking her head in the bathroom. I sigh and nod my head. I stuffed the test in my purse before walking out.

I walked into the courtroom with my parents by my side. I sat in the front right behind where Xavier would be sitting and my parents sat in the row right behind me. Xavier's mom and family entered as well. They all came and sat in the same row as me as well.

Seconds later Xavier was escorted out. He had a fresh haircut for sentencing. His high yellow skin was starting to get a little pale due to the lack of sunlight. He looks at me and smiles. I missed his face and embrace so much.

"How many years is he facing?" I hear my mom ask my dad.

"The lawyer got it down to 3"

The officer takes off his hands cuff and he goes over to his family and leans over to hug them. They were all just so happy to see him. I was sad that I'm the reason they were here to begin with. The judge walks in followed by the jury and everyone sat down.

"I understand that the jury has come to a verdict" The judge says.

"Yes your honor"

My heart started to race. I sat up straight and I was practically on the edge of my seat.

"On the charges of manslaughter of Dante Jackson on April 21st, 2018 we the jury find Xavier Michaels guilty as charged"

My stomach instantly fell into my ass. This can't be happening. This isn't happening. My mom and dad both grabbed my hands. "No no no no" I kept repeating over and over shaking my head. Xavier looks back at me and I instantly stood up to hug him, "I love you"

"I love you too Chanel" He tells me pecking my lips just as the police pulled him away.

Tears streamed down my face and I stormed out of the court. My chest was getting tight and I felt like I was about to die. He's in jail for something he didn't do.

I ran outside and pressed my back against the brick wall trying to control my breathing. The doors open and quickly removed my hand. "He'll be home in no time" My mom rubs my arm and I just nod my head. This could have been worse, he could have been in there for only god knows when.

The things he does on a everyday basis would have had him in jail way longer than which is crazy because someone lost their life.

I look over and Xavier's mom walks out with a few other family members. I quickly fanned my eyes trying to dry my tears.

"This isn't the way I thought we were gonna meet" His mom laughs as she walks over to me with open arms. I smile and we hug each other rocking side to side.

"Xavier has nothing but good things to say about you. We were supposed to meet at the dinner a little while ago. I'm sorry about your loss sweetie"

"Thanks. It's nice to meet you finally Mrs. Michaels"

"That lawyer of yours is the reason my baby is only doing 3 years and not 25. I really appreciate it" I smile softly and nod my head. It's my fault he's in there at all.

"Please keep in touch okay? If you ever need anything just let me know" She hugs me once more before walking off.

My parents and I walk to our cars before parting way. I sat down in the driver seats and reached into my purse. I grabbed the pregnancy test and closed my eyes. I let out a loud sigh before looking down in my hands.

Pregnant 2-3 months.

My eyes instantly got watery. I couldn't believe it. Xavier and I had sex one time since the miscarriage. For me to have gotten pregnant after that is slim to none. Wow.

I'm really about to be a single mom for the next three years. How do I even tell Xavier I'm pregnant? I sat there trying to wrap my head around all of this. Xavier's gone for 3 years and now I have a baby in my stomach.

Great.