Minerva walked onto the stage With the girls and chairs.
Cell Block Tango"
[Minerva:]
And now the six merry murderesses of the Cook County Jail
In their rendition of ([Pansy:] Uh uh!) 'The Cell Block Tango'
Then Minerva walked off the stage.
[Pansy:]
Pop!
[Luna:]
Six!
[Hermione:]
Squish!
[Pansy:]
Uh uh!
[Hermione:]
Cicero!
[Luna:]
Lipschitz!
[Pansy:]
Pop!
[Luna:]
Six!
[Hermione:]
Squish!
[Panssy:]
Uh uh!
[Hermione:]
Cicero!
[Luna:]
Lipschitz!
[Pansy:]
Pop!
[Luna:]
Six!
[Hermione:]
Squish!
[Pansy:]
Uh uh!
[Hermione:]
Cicero!
[Luna:]
Lipschitz!
[Pansy:]
Pop!
[Luna:]
Six!
[Hermione:]
Squish!
[Pansy:]
Uh uh!
[Hermione:]
Cicero!
[Luna:]
Lipschitz!
[Pansy, Hermione, and Luna:]
He had it coming, he had it coming
He only had himself to blame
If you'd have been there, if you'd have seen it
[Hermione:]
I betcha you would have done the same
[Pansy:]
Pop!
[Luna:]
Six!
[Hermione:]
Squish!
[Pansy:]
Uh uh!
[Hernione:]
Cicero!
[Luna:]
Lipschitz!
[Pansy:]
Pop!
[Luna:]
Six!
[Hermione:]
Squish!
[Pansy:]
Uh uh!
[Hermione:]
Cicero!
[Luna:]
Lipschitz!
[Pansy(Chorus playing in the background):]
You know how people have these little habits
That get you down
Like Bernie, Bernie, He likes to chew gum, no, not chew, Pop!
So I came home this one day and I'm really irritated and I'm looking for a lil' bit of sympathy
And there's Bernie layin' on the couch, drinkin' a beer and chewin'
No, not chewin', poppin'!
So, I said to him, I said
"You pop that gum one more time..." and he did
So I took the shotgun off the wall
And I fired two warning shots into his head
[Pansy, Hermione, and Luna:]
He had it coming, he had it coming
He only had himself to blame
If you'd have been there, if you'd have heard it
I betcha you would have done the same
[Luna (Chorus playing in the background):]
I met Ezekiel Young from Salt Lake City about two years ago
And he told me he was single and we hit it off right away
So, we started living together
He'd go to work, he'd come home, I'd fix him a drink, and we'd have dinner.
And then I found out,
Single, he told me
Single, my butt!
Not only was he married, oh no, he had six wives
One of those Mormons, you know
So that night, when he came home from work
I fixed him his drink as usual
You know, some guys just can't hold their arsenic
[Pansy, Hermione and Luna:]]
He had it coming (Pop! Six! Squish!)
He had it coming (Uh uh! Cicero! Lipschitz!)
He took a flower (Pop! Six! Squish!) in its prime (Uh uh! Cicero! Lipschitz!)
And then he used it (Pop!) and he abused it (Six!)
It was a murder (Squish!) but not a crime (Uh uh! Cicero! Lipschitz!)
[Hermione:]
Now, I'm standing in the kitchen
Carvin' up the chicken for dinner, mindin' my own business
And in storms my husband Wilbur in a jealous rage
"You been doin' the milkman!"
He says, he was crazy and he kept on screamin'
"You been doin' the milkman!"
Then he ran into my knife
He ran into my knife ten times
[Pansy and Luna:]
The dirty bum, bum, bum, bum, bum
The dirty bum, bum, bum, bum, bum
[Pansy, Hermione and Luna:]
They had it comin', they had it comin'
They had it comin', they had it comin'
They had it comin', they had it comin', all along, all along
'Cause if they used us and they abused us
How could they tell us that we were wrong?
Could you tell us that we were wrong?
When they finished they all bowed as everyone in Hogwarts was clapping.
