WHAT?
NIALL LIKED MY PIC!
HE KNOWS WHO I AM
Wait what picture?
I unlocked my phone entering my passcode 7775 (SPSL for 'Starbucks pumpkin spice latte)
and he liked my edit! I made him a punk edit! omg I'm gonna reply
"Omfg ni ni ily so much!¡ I cnt belleh you cummnted ty ily!"
I wonder if he'll reply...
Probs not bc no one likes me!!!
I put my phone down once again on my stash of endless empty starbux cups and took a nap and dreamed about my Ni Ni <3
*2 hours l8r*
I woke from my nap and went to go get another donut bc sleeping takes alot of work and tires me tf out, walking down the stairs takes lots of work 2 especially with my butthole condition!!
Teddy was in the kitchen eating mY DONUT
WAT
"TEDDY THATS MI FOKIN DONUT WTF ARE YOU DOING YOU DONT EAT LIL ANOREXIC SHIT!"
"Dad! Don't yell! Toby is sleeping and you've had like 9 donuts today!"
"U ALL RUIN MI LIFE I HATE U!!!"
I cnt belleh she did that! Why couldnt she just have ripped my heart out instead, would have been less painful! I wanted to cri and di. She doesnt get that the donuts take away the butthole burning sensation!!! Ugh
Repeating the steps from earlier i stomped up the stairs, kicking a hole in the stair in the process. PJ heard the noise.
"DAD! Quiet down Toby just fell asleep!!"
"STFU PJ TEDDY ATE MY DONUT AND NIALL LIKE MY IG PIC AND I JUST CAME TO HAVE A GOOD TIME AND IM HONESTLY FEELING SO ATTACKED RN"
I hear Toby crying now, sugar dabunskies.
"See Dad? You woke Toby!"
"WHAT AND EVER IM LEAVING!"
I grapped my phone and moni for starbux and ran out the house. As I trotted to the nearby starbux I saw a whimsical looking forest thingy place with lollipops and marijuana leaves and other things blocking the way of starbux.
"Everyone get out of the wey!! I need my starbux"
All of a sudden a blond boy comes riding in on a pink unicorn
"Im sorry Bob, Im afraid you cant pass rn"
"....Ni Ni?"
YOU ARE READING
Butthole, a Bob Duncan Fanfic
FanfictionBob wasn't your average fat man, he had a bad condition that occurred in his butthole, or anus if you will. It has prevented Bob from living and fulfilling his dream of being a rice farmer in the deep forests of Narnia, with his bb, Niall Horan. Wil...
