It wasn't a secret that finn loved her first
It should be known, first and foremost, that Finn loved her first.
He actually introduced Puck and Rachel, funnily enough. Rachel was in his creative writing class his sophomore year of college, and they became fast friends. He thought he even might ask her out for coffee, but Puck demolished that plan before it could even be set in motion, catching them both on their way to class one day, and from the second he winked at Rachel, she was Puck's girl.
Finn never told either one of them how he felt, and now he supposes he never will, because he's standing at Puck and Rachel's engagement party, trying not to look like the way he feels: sick to his stomach.
He's the camera man, in charge of capturing all the special moments that are sure to be occurring. He should probably be taking his job more seriously, but when his best friend's engaged to the girl of his dreams, it's a little hard to want to catch every kiss, every touch. Actually, he'd much rather ignore them.
Puck and Rachel have been together for five years now, and Finn wishes the pain would fade, but it never does. It's always as fresh as it was the very first day, always feels like his heart is being ripped out of his chest when he sees them together. And he has no idea how to make things better, easier.
At the present time, Puck and Rachel are dancing. Puck's making some sort of weird face, and Rachel laughs, her hair tumbling over her shoulder as she throws her head back, her mouth open wide. Finn presses the zoom button on the camera so only Rachel is in the shot, her eyes crinkled around the edges.
She leans forward, and now Puck's in the shot, and she's whispering in his ear, and Finn thinks he might be sick, so he puts the camera down, taking deep breaths in and out. His stepbrother, Kurt, sees him from across the room, and he frowns.
Finn gives him a weak smile.
Kurt knows about Finn's feelings for Rachel, and he's constantly telling Finn that Rachel deserves to know the way he feels, but honestly, what good will it do? She'll just say that Finn's sweet, but she loves Puck, and he already knows that, obviously. Plus Puck will probably punch him, so literally no good would come from her finding out.
He wants the one girl he can't have, and despite the fact that she'll never love him back, he can't help but wish she did.
....
He can never give Puck and Rachel this video. Puck's in maybe two shots, and the rest of the time, the camera's zoomed in on Rachel's face, making it pretty obvious that there was only person Finn was concerned with the entire night. Maybe if he had drunk a little less, and maybe if he had been able to put aside his feelings for a few hours, things would have turned out differently, but what's done is done, and he can definitely never give Puck and Rachel this footage.
The Rachel on screen laughs during Kurt's toast, and the camera zooms in on her mouth, painted cherry red, making her teeth look impossibly whiter. It lingers there for a moment, and then it slowly zooms out far enough to see that Rachel's fingers are firmly entangled with Puck's. The shot cuts off, and next Rachel is talking with her dads, her eyes wide and bright as she tells a story.
Finn smiles. She always makes elaborate hand gestures when she gets into a story, her eyes bright, and her daddy chuckles, gently patting the hand that's not currently moving. Rachel glances over at the camera then, giving a small wave.
