Passenger

Chapter 28

Pathetic.

"Krys!" I shouted, as he disappeared into the rapids. Neb and Sarah shouted as well, but I disregarded them quickly, plunging myself into the water after him. The Avian was barely visible though the bubbles and foam, but I could see him thrashing and flailing in the water, being swept about by the current.

Useless.

I did my best to get in front of him, trying to get his attention. "swim up, Krys!" I shouted, unsure of how well he could hear me. "swim up! Up! Like this!"

I mimed doing a breaststroke up towards the surface. Thankfully, he saw me and did his best to mimic it, clawing for the surface. I think his head broke the surface a few times, though it was hard to tell while keeping track of him. this area was only about eight feet deep by my guess, but with the water swirling around the rocks and tossing him about, it was more than enough water to drown him in.

Useless, Useless, Useless...

Everything was happening so quick and so abruptly that it was hard to keep track. I knew Neb and Sarah were moving further away, along with the boat, but every time I took my eyes off Krys, he moved another couple feet away from me, and I kept getting dragged with him. I was panicking. What could I do? I could only watch and keep trying to get Krys to swim for the surface.

He hit another rock – badly. I think he hit his head, because he fell limp for several seconds, bubbles trailing from between his lips. "Krys! Stay with me!" I shouted at him, as I saw him blink numbly. "you need to keep trying to get your head above water! Keep swimming up!"

Pathetic.

He washed ashore, unresponsive. I had no idea whether he was dead or not, just that he wasn't answering me. I couldn't tell if he was moving, if he was breathing, I couldn't even tell if he had a heartbeat. I shouted and screamed at him for what felt like an eternity, without any sort answer. There was nothing I could do.

Now I was just...there. Watching over Krys, unable to do anything to help him. I had no idea where we had washed up on the shore, either, and I couldn't get far enough away from Krys to make out any noticeable landmarks. No sign of Sarah or Neb, or even just the boat. Hell, I would've even been happy if the Riverman showed up, but naturally, there was no such luck there.

Sitting beside Krys' body, I glanced down at him. "if I could just touch you, I could help you." I muttered, finally voicing the words that had been bouncing around in my head. "this is why I need my body. Because without it, I...I can't help you. I can't help anyone." I paused, then moved closer to him. "I mean, you get that, right? If I was here, I could solve all these problems! I could...I could save you right now! Or, if you're...already gone, I could've saved you..."

I trailed off, voice catching. Hastily I started again. "but you're not! You're not dead, because if you're dead, well, it'd at least be good manners for you to come join me as a ghost, right? It's the least you could do for me, right?" clenching my fists, I wanted to drag my hands across my face, but I couldn't. "because that'd make you a real jerk, you know that? doing this whole pacifist thing, being kind to everyone, and then just – just – leaving me here like this? You'd have to be a real jerk to do that to me, Krys! A real asshole!"

My voice trailed off. I slumped and turned away, the despair sinking in again. What was the point? It was clear that, dead or not, he couldn't hear me, so there wasn't anything I could do. Pathetic and useless. That's all I was. Pathetic, pathetic, pathetic –