Fantasma

Prologue

Dead promises

Paintings of the world so pure

Ancient prophecies

Remains of the worlds so cruel

The time has come

To hide from the sun

"He's falling apart, Sensei." Raphael confided in Master Splinter, not being able to take his brother's off behaviour any longer.

"I am well aware of that." Splinter replied calmly, fixing his son with a stern glare. "But it is not out place to interfere-"

"Not our place?" Raph scoffs at his Master. "Sensei, we can't just stand and do nothing! One of there days he'll lead us into some sort of death trap without even realising it! I don't know what happened on that 'pilgrimage' of his-"

"My son, do you doubt your brother's ability to lead? Or do you doubt his ability to cope with his own problems?" The old rat leaned forward and met the red cladded turtle's eyes, searching them for an answer. 'Or are you about to admit that you care deeply about your brother and do not wish to see him hurt?"

"The second on..." The red cladded turtle muttered defiantly, a sour look gracing his features.

"I thought as much." Master Splinter sat back, satisfied with the curt answer. "Although I must urge you to put more faith in your brother's strength of character. I am certain that, at least for the moment, that this is nothing too serious. I shall, however, speak with him if he continues to act this way. I do not know the reasoning behind it but I am certain that it will not be justified."

"You got that right, Master Splinter." Raphael mumbled.

"Raphael, please do not trouble Leonardo any further, and do not try to obtain answers from him or any of the others, as I believe they know no more than you. Now, leave me to meditate."

"Hai, Sensei."

......

The woman took a shaking breath, her long, dark black hair cascading across her face. "Raph..." She bit at her lip, meeting his weak blue gaze. "Mikey, Donnie...? You call their names in the night. Are they brethren?"

Hearing his brothers' names, Leonardo's heart gave a pang in longing. "Yes." He confirms after several moments of silence. "And they are my brothers."

"You seem to miss them very much. You often mentioned protecting them, and cried." The woman said softly.

Leo looked away, trying to hide his bitter smile. "Sounds about right."

When the turtle was quiet, she changed the subject. "One day, you truly frightened me, tortuga. You had not opened your eyes for a very long time or made any noises. But you made one then-not a good one." She shook her head. "I had to breathe for you to bring you back t this world. You balanced on the brink of death." The Hispanic woman looked at him strangely. "Tell me, tortuga, can you die?"

The blue cladded turtle's breath had caught upon hearing her speak. For a moment, Leo could only stare in shock at the woman. He shook his head, amazed and feeling indebted but then realised that she'd asked him a question. "Uh, yeah." He responded. "Pretty easily."

"A ghost is already dead." The woman replied in confusion.

"I'm no ghost." Leonardo replied, his voice barely a whisper.

"Then you are a demon." It wasn't a question.

Surrounded by the firelight, Leonardo sat on the thick mat, a prayer rug for the faithful that now framed his body and draw looks down away from the shadows above him. The candle light did not reach the ceiling, leaving it comfortably dark, a smouldering shade of gold that wavered unsteadily in the flickering glow.

A silvery tear cascaded down the blue cladded turtle's cheek, and he gasped softly. His fingers lingered against the soft skin that enveloped his sapphire orbs, his lips parted ever so slightly. The memory had stirred unwanted emotions, emotions that were meant to be left unfelt.

"Uh... Leo?" Raphael edged into his brother's room, but Leo's eyes snapped open and he sat bolt upright as soon as Raph had taken one step into his room.

"Get out." Leo ordered his brother sharply, his eyes cold.

"You can't keep this under wraps forever, bro. Sooner or later, your problems will out and there ain't nothing you can do about it." The red cladded turtle replied, trying to keep his cool. "Master Splinter sent you on that pilgrimage for you to get better. Is this bett-?"

"I said- Get. Out." Leo repeated through gritted teeth, narrowing his eyes.

"Fine, I'll leave, but don't expect me to help you when you can't hack it anymore. You wanna be stubborn then it's your call, but don't you dare to even think about getting my help in the future!" The door slammed shut, the sound echoing throughout the small room.

Leonardo closed his eyes, hastily wiping away the tear. "Hothead."

Resentment coloured his thoughts. It was because of his pilgrimage that things had changed, that he changed- changed in ways that made his blood curdle and bile rise. And he hated himself for it, because he was a ghost.

A demon.

Leonardo opened his eyes again, and an ink-black membrane had pushed across his blue hues. The blue cladded turtle blinked and one by one began extinguishing the many candles he'd lit, wishing to lay alone in the darkness. To separate himself further from everyone; the light. The candles all puffed out, sending up trails of smoke as he passed.

In sleep, Donatello lay curled on his side, head nestled against his folded pillow. He breathed so lightly that even Leonardo strained to hear it, soothing and comforting to hear it in the still air. And the more he caught Donatello's heartbeat, faint but growing, as if it were slowly coming nearer and nearer.

His brother was alive, so alarmingly and tantalisingly alive, warm and breathing and vulnerable. Leonardo felt some part of himself ache to see this, in love with watching over his younger brother, hearing his whole body moving and working, even in rest.

"Leo-?" Donatello whispered, as he opened his eyes. "Is something wrong with you-? A-are you... okay...?"

"Sleep," Leonardo stated, one last gaze towards the purple cladded turtle as he walked out of the lair, "and forget."

'No, they can't even begin to comprehend what happened while I was training to fall in line- to be the perfect soldier, to be "Fearless" fucking leader.' He thought bitterly, 'They could never understand what I am- what I've become.'

He prayed no one ever would.

Like a rat I run to the darkness

Ray of light erases my mind

Afraid to look back into the heartless

World of dust and blood