Flowers for Lilah (Seth Clearwater)

chapter twelve

It was my first kiss, and it was perfect. Seth's warm lips pressed chastely against mine, I didn't want it to ever end. But it did, when we both needed air, but our lips couldn't stay apart for much longer than a few seconds. They found eachother again. And again. And then again. The warm traveled from my fuzzy brain all the way to my curled toes.

We finally pulled away, I got this strange inkling that maybe- just maybe- Seth and I wouldn't be so tongue tied around one another anymore.

"Seth-" I say softly, our faces still centimeters from each other, his hands still holding my face. I'm not even sure what I'm going to say.

"Lilah," he responds, and the breathlessness to it sends chills down my spine. I can't recall who leaned in first, but our lips are connected together again.

Though I'm begging myself to not be obsessive, I try to deny this feeling in the pit of my stomach. This feeling that's telling me that I've finally found what I've needed- something I didn't even know I was yearning for. We pull away after another breathless moment and I can't find a word to say, instead I just blush. Seth chuckles at my red face, grabbing my hand and pulling me towards the exit to his truck.

"Thank you for taking me out," I say as his truck rolls into my driveway. The lights are off, meaning my grandparents are asleep. The words don't convey what I really want to say.

"I'll take you out anytime, just say the word." He nods he head.

"What about tomorrow?" My voice speaks too soon, and Seth's boyish grin finds a way to his face, perking up like a puppy. "I'm not really doing anything fun, but I'm home alone all day, I might get bored."

He nods his head excitedly as I open the car door, and I'm almost gone until I hear a desperate, "wait!"

I turn around to face Seth's handsome face, getting back in the car. He looks nervous again as he takes a deep breath, "Lilah, I just- uh- want you to know that I really like- I mean, yeah. I really, really like you. I'm not trying to put pressure on you, but someday- not now, unless you want to now, I would really like for us to be more than friends. I'd really like for you to be mine."

I'm stumped. "Oh, Seth... I... can't." I shake my head, feeling a hardness in my throat, "I... didn't realize you were starting to care- I- I'm so stupid. I'm so stupid," I groan, "I really have to go."

"What?" He is shocked, hurt rings through his eye. I want to kiss the hurt away, my heart crying for him. "But, why? I thought that kiss... I thought we were feeling the same way."

"We were," I'm frustrated, "Seth, this can't happen."

"But I care about you." His eyes hold despair, their dark, ready to tear up. Does he care that much?

This hits a nerve. "Stop!" My voice is soft but firm, "Never say that." I hurl myself out of the car ungracefully in my haste, "I have to go." As I slam the door.