Aquarelle [h.s]

thirty-two

It'd been two days since the unfortunate morning in which I'd mistakenly kissed Harry, and I hadn't talked to him since.

I'd realised how messed up it was of me to kiss him in the second my lips had touched his, and for that reason I'd quickly stood up, not lingering one second too long into the kiss.

We hadn't really talked after that. I'd just muttered a sorry and then got out of the cafe without looking back, even forgetting my hot chocolate. I hadn't wasted any time in going into the building of my studio and up the stairs, making sure there was no spare key out before going inside and locking the door.

I hadn't done much after that. I'd told myself I should've got it together and start a new painting as I waited for Nicholas to leave the flat, but I'd soon realised that it wouldn't have been possible, as the only thing that was on my mind, playing over and over again, was the kiss.

I didn't know why I'd kissed Harry. It made no sense for me to do something like that. We were friends and I knew it, and I was completely happy with that, so why had I done it? Harry had told me lovely things, but was that just it? Would I have kissed Louis too, if he'd said the same things?

Nothing made sense anymore. In the span of an hour I'd kicked my ex boyfriend out of my life and ruined my perfectly good friendship with Harry, and I didn't even know why. I hadn't even told him anything, I'd just got up and left. How had I managed to screw everything up just like that? What was wrong with me?

Two days after, I still hadn't heard from Harry. He hadn't called me, and neither I had. It was as if we'd reached the mutual agreement to act like the other didn't exist, and for a while it was fine. It really was. It stopped being fine after a while, though. I hated to admit it, but I really missed Harry. I could feel the void he'd left in my life and I didn't like it. How was it possible that something as little as a peck had ruined a friendship it'd taken months to build?

I knew I had to find a way to fix it. But I didn't know how to do it alone. I didn't even know how I was supposed to act around him anymore. I needed someone to help me figure out what to do next, someone that was already familiar with Harry that could've told me the best thing to do. I knew I couldn't ask Liam, though. He was a fixer, and considering we were both very close to him, he would've surely tried to become the middle man to help us solve our issues. That sounded like a loss to me.

For that reason, I decided to go with my second option: Violet. She wasn't particularly close to Harry herself, but she'd been in his presence enough times to know what he was like.

That morning I went to Liam's flat early, hoping that I would've got to talk to Violet a little bit before having to go to the studio. I truly hoped that she would've helped me to make sense of the entire situation, because I didn't even know what to do anymore at that point.

When I arrived to their flat Violet was the only one in it, but unfortunately it didn't last long.

We were talking on the couch when I heard the front door open and I looked behind her, frowning when I saw Liam walk into the flat. I'd got there at eight in the morning specifically because I knew he'd already left for work, so I couldn't understand why he was there.

"What are you doing here already?" Violet asked him, seeming to be as confused as I was.

He sent her a glance as he crossed the room. "Harry called me" he said, taking something from the bookshelf in front of the couch. "He had another one of his moments."

Violet frowned, seeming to understand. "Oh no."

"What does it mean?" I asked her furrowing my eyebrows in confusion, but she just shook her head, indicating that it wasn't something I should've asked about in that moment.