Sherlock sometimes thinks about darkness.
It covers a large field. There is not just one definition of the word.
Sometimes he can feel it surrounding him. Well, not really, can he? Darkness is figurative. Just the absence of light. But sometimes, he thinks he can. An eery vastness that is forever growing, growing. It covers him, sometimes. Closing in on him till he cannot breath.
But it can't, can it?
But it does. Doesn't it?
The thing is, light thinks it travels faster than anything, but it's wrong. No matter how fast light travels, it finds the darkness has always got there first, and is waiting for it.
***
He has not spoken to John in over two weeks. Not in exactly sixteen days. That is 384 hours. The minutes do not matter.
When Sherlock Holmes sees John Watson, he thinks: Boring. Ordinary. Dull. But he was bored. So he followed
him.
When Sherlock Holmes first meets John Watson, he thinks. Interesting. No more. No less.
But now when Sherlock Holmes thinks of John Watson; when he sees him across the canteen or in the hall or in class, he cannot fathom him. It's like all of the constellations forged into a single human being with eyes of oceans, and how could that any less than marvelous? He cannot understand John Watson. He has barely even met John Watson. And yet he has stolen his line of focus.
He has never known anyone so fascinating.
***
Sometimes the emptiness in a room becomes palpable as if you could reach out and touch it real, hear its silence, feel its black nothingness. It invades your spirit, your soul like a stealthy misperception; a liquid lie that whispers and will not die.
Again, all figurative. Which is ridiculous.
But how would he even describe it, besides poorly?
That night, when it happens, he climbs in through John's window and breaths for the first time in ages. That night, when he climbs into John's bed, he worries for a moment, but he feels John's reaction, and he sees. John isn't just the constellations.
He's the whole goddamn universe.
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Fanfiction"Light thinks it travels faster than anything but it is wrong. No matter how fast light travels, it finds the darkness has always got there first, and is waiting for it."
