The perfume of love (rain-bi)

chapter 37

Earlier, seeing Terry in mufti had made her realise how a smart uniform could transform a man's appearance and give a false impression of the type of person he was. In his own clothes, Terry Anson looked much more brash and foxy than in his regular clothes.

He had come on deck wearing very tight white synthetic trousers and white patent loafers with gilt trim. His aloha shirt was one of the most garish she had seen, and he had left several buttons open to show off two gold neck-chains, one of them longer than the other with a large medallion swinging from it. A flashy ring and a gold identity bracelet were two other pieces of jewellery he didn't normally wear. The total effect was that his natural milieu was a race-course or a club with a shady reputation. Even his hair had a styled look as if he had spent half an hour carefully blow-drying it into shape.

Her father's vanity, although of a different order from Terry's, had made jenna wary of men who took an inordinate interest in their appearance. She couldn't imagin jihoon possessing a dryer. He would vigorously tousle his thick dark hair with a towel, brush or comb it back from his forehead and timples, and have it trimmed at regular intervals. Ten times as good-looking as Terry, he probably rarely looked at himself in a mirror except when he was shaving or trying on new clothes.

Following Jihoon's quite aside, Terry disappeared for a while, and when he came back his shirt had only the top button unfastened. She saw him shoot a resentful look at jihoon's broad back.

When Eleni reappeared her manner was composed and she looked particularly lovely in a loose, halter-strapped sundress in shades of saffron and peach, two colours particularly becoming to the bistre tones of her skin.

She and Mrs lee and the two chefs had their lunch with the passengers. Youngji ate his behind the buffet table with dong won also there, chatting to him and helping him replenish people's glasses with champagne. The rest of the crew had a picnic lunch ashore in the shade of the coconut palms.

Very soon she would have to return to a workaday world which, in this present setting, seemed as remote and unreal as the South Pacific had seemed when she was nursing her father in Seoul.

She thought about jihoon and Eleni sharing the future on a schooner, perhaps one something like the coral-sailed schooner Tui Tai which had left Lautoka at the same time as Ocean Wanderer, ferrying a crowd of young people to Beachcomber Island.

Visualising their happy life together, she knew that whoever had coined the expression 'my heart bleeds' must have felt as she did today; as if, minute by minute, her own capacity for happiness was draining away; as if, all the time she was smiling and sipping champagne, she was dying inside.

Lunch was over and some people had gone below for a siesta while others were lingering over coffee and the apparently inexhaustible supply of champagne when jihoon strolled over to where she was sitting with dong won.

"I'm off for a nap," said the young Engineer as jihoon joined them .

He and jenna were sharing a two-seater white cane sofa.
Dong won said, "see you later jenna," and gave he shoulder paternal pat before vacating his place beside her.

As jihoon took it over, he said,

"I'm going to clear my head with a swim. How about you?"

His friendly smile was a refinement of the torture of being close to him.

"I think I'd rather amulate dong won and perhaps have a swim later on," she answered.

She would have risen, but jihoon put a hand on her arm and stopped her.

"I couldn't help hearing part of what you were saying to Youngji before lunch."

As he paused, she tensed, wondering what was coming next.

"About love," he added, as if she might have forgotten.

When she remained silent, he went on, "You've changed a great deal since you joined us. Physically you're in much better shape. I'm referring to your health, not your figure," he added, with a slight smile.

"there was never anything wrong with that, but you looked very white and worn out. Now you're tanned and rested. I'm sure you've never looked better, Except..." Once again he paused, his keen eyes searching her face.

"Except that I think there's still something on your mind."

There was no one near them, but even so he dropped his voice a tone as he said, "I don't think it's only concern for your sister, although I know that's one of your worries."

She had turned her head to avoid his penetrating scrutiny. Now she flashed an uncertain glance at him.

"Blood isn't always thicker than water, I'm afraid. You'll have to face that. I would go as far as to say you have more in common with Eleni than with hana."

"I like Eleni very much," she said, in a low voice. "she's a lovely person."

"I've always thought so," he agreed.

"I'm glad you share my opinion. So does youngji at rock bottom, although you might not think so. But he'll come round in time, and then it'll be all plain sailing."

If only he knew how hurtful this was to her. Thank God he didn't.

"I heard you tell youngji.... And I'm glad you did.... That love is the most important thing in life," he went on.

"Am I right in thinking you were speaking from experience when you told youngji about the painful experience of loving and not being loved back?"

Was he talking about the past or the present? The possibility that he might have guessed how she felt about him was shattering.

Then, to her relief, he added.

"was there.... Is there someone in Korea whom you're still missing, jenna?"

She jumped at the explanation. Anything was preferable to having him suspect the truth.

"Yes... yes there is," she said.

His brows drew together. "I see. I thought that might be the reason. Well, you're very young and the chances are that in a few years' time you'll wonder what you saw in him. There are plenty of other pebbles on the beach, especially for a girl like you, with intelligence as well as looks"

Somehow wishing she hadn't lied to him, even to save her pride, jenna said listlessly, "I hope so."

"Are you still planning to fly back to Korea from Fiji? Why not finish the cruise and see something of Australia?"

"I feel I've imposed on joon too long as it is," she answered.

"I should like to visit Australia, but not in my present circumstances as.... As a free loader."

"I don't think Mr Dennison or anyone else regard you in that light. If you don't want to stay on board once we reach Sydney, I can fix you up on an au pair basis with one of my cousins' families. it's midsummer in Australia. Several of my cousins' wives are carrer-women who are always glad of extra help in the house, particularly during the school holidays, which go on till early February. You'd have a roof over your head, a little pin-money and time off for sightseeing. Think it over."

"Yes.... yes I will. It's very kind of you to suggest it."

He rose to his feet. Looking down at her, he said, "It would make life pleasanter for Eleni to have you on board. She's in a difficult position at the moment. You know why she's helping shaney. Having someone who knows the set up to talk to would be a big help to her. Are you sure you won't change your mind about coming for a swim?"

There was nothing she would have liked more, but she shook her head.

"Okay. See you later." jihoon walked away.