My Ex From Hell (The Blooming Goddess Trilogy, #1)

If you can't beat 'em, poison 'em (Part 5)

I'd been paralyzed from a dart in my side. I slumped to the floor, unable to hold up my own weight. I tried to scream, but my voice didn't work. Someone laughed. I tried to see who, but couldn't.

"This is where you found me?" Theo nodded in response.

"Any thoughts on how you got here?" Hades spoke in a tone of utter disinterest. I couldn't tell if he really wanted to know or was bluffing.

Either way, I wasn't going to give him the satisfaction.

"Going to murder me outright now?" I accused. "You hid behind your Cap of Invisibility the first time."

Hades frowned. "If I'd killed you, my face would have been the last thing you'd seen." His expression changed to that of kindly host. "You look pale. Come. Sit."

He led us to an enormous pile of throw cushions on the ground, each one of which was sofa-sized for Theo and me.

I surreptitiously slid the pendant into the pocket of my fleece jacket. I was hoping for out of sight, out of mind as far as Hades was concerned.

He saw me and smiled, amused. "You can hold on to your trinket." The "for now" was implied.

We'd see about that. This gem was coming with me, no matter what.

Hades clapped his hands.

A winged baby emerged from the hallway, hovering in mid-air, a tray with two small and one much larger wine goblet in his hands. No cutie pie, him. He was more like "Children of the Corn" creepified by a zillion. I began shivering with terror.

Theo stroked my back to keep me calm.

"You don't remember Thanatos? Death?" asked Hades.

I gasped at the reveal of the baby's name.

"The false one hurts my feelings," Thanatos said dryly, in a surprisingly low voice. "Wine?"

I recalled Theo's warnings and shook my head. I didn't trust my voice to speak.

"No? Shame. Such a good vintage." Hades drank deeply from his own glass. "Something to eat, then?"

I looked between Hades, Lord of the Underworld, lounging in front of me with his booze, and the floating death baby with the rumbly voice and felt hysterical laughter bubble up inside me. One way or another I was going to be killed yet again in this place.

"Sure," I tossed out, numb. "Pomegranates."

"Soph," Theo warned.

"What?" I laughed. "I really think fruit is the least of our worries right now, Theo."

"I give you my word no harm will come to you from the food or drink," Hades said. "There are so many other ways to destroy you."

"Still. We're good," Theo reiterated.

A bearded young man, who happened to be both naked and have wings spouting from his head, arrived. Guess they were just for show, as he was planted firmly on the ground. He presented me with a large silver bowl of pomegranate seeds.

"It is my pleasure to serve you. Your love of this fruit is legendary." Naked guy sounded like he was a two-pack-a-day man.

I recalled he was Hypnos, a.k.a. Sleep. The twin to Death. I guess "twin" had a lot more leeway in Greek than in English.

I averted my eyes from Hypnos' unattractive nudity.

"We're not going to eat or drink," Theo said. "So just get on with whatever you're planning on doing to us."

Ten points for Theo's cockiness but minus a million for trying to get us killed a second sooner than we had to be.

Hades shrugged. "Your choice." He tossed back a handful of seeds. Suddenly he turned a violent shade of purple and clutched at his throat, coughing.

"My Lord!" Hypnos and Thanatos flew to his side.

Theo grabbed my hand and yanked me to my feet as Hypnos stared down at his bowl in horror. "The goddess. She called for the seeds."

"You've poisoned Hades!" Baby roared. "And now you will die!"

The ginormous God of the Underworld was potentially dying and it looked like I'd encouraged him to snarf the poison. Throw in my motive for wanting revenge for attempted murder, and saying "I didn't do it" probably wasn't going to cut it with his evil minions.

Time to blow this joint, and fast.