A Prank By Loki

Sam's Day Pt 1

Sam's P.O.V

Apparently, I'm on babysitting duty today. Because it's completely ok to leave the guy who's not a massive fan of kids in general in charge of an actual living child - who also happens to have super powers.

The reason I was chosen today instead of one of the others?

Tony's got board meetings all day, Steve and Bucky are on a date day, Natasha and Clint are at SHIELD and Bruce just refuses to look after Peter - probably scared that he could hulk out.

Speaking of the child - I could hear him waking up from his early morning nap, a deep sigh escaping my lips as I got up to deal with him. It's been about a month now and to be honest we've all noticed he's been regressing mentally since the spell started - he has his own mind but he's about as emotionally stable as any other toddler. I sigh as I get into his nursery to see said toddler glaring up at me from the crib. "Peter." I say with a sigh seeing as he's managed to yank his onesie off - well mostly. "You know you got to keep that on, it's winter." I mutter lifting him up. Pausing when I feel how wet his onesie and nappy is. "Damn, you pissed through it? Tony's really got to get the science down for a nappy that can actually hold the amount you put into it." I mutter, wincing when he gives a low, unhappy whine. Ok yeah, that was harsh. "Sorry bud, didn't mean to sound like an ass. Lets get you cleaned and get you something to eat yeah?" I ask him quietly and all he does is curl into me quietly.

"Dada?" He asks me and I have to bite back a sigh - that's something we've noticed as well - The kid has been referring to each one of us as something parental, let me break it down to you whilst I deal with Pete's soaked nappy.

Tony's Dada

Bucky's daddy

Steve's Papa

Bruce is Tata

Clint's dah

Nat's Mama

And me? well I'm Buh-ba. I'm not sure why but honestly I don't mind. Now, it's time for me to break the kids heart. Don't believe me? Watch.

"No baby boy, dada's gone out to work today. It's just me and you today." and just like that, tear filled eyes and a heart breaking sob escape him and he's now refusing to let me finish clothing him, apparently he's overtly attached to Tony and by extension the super-solider twins. Not that I'm complaining but for the love of Christ, getting him ready for the day and distracting him is about to become an Olympic sport - maybe I should call Tony back from work as he struggles under my hands - finally getting the overalls on I grin widely - Success!

"No!" He yells at me, yanking at the overalls with a whine. I really need to start spending more time with him because I'm lost on what to do. Nat and Clint would know how to deal with a screaming Peter Parker and I'm here just trying not to drop him.

"Peter, that's enough young man!" I wince hearing Steve's voice behind me. "Sam, we're heading out in twenty minutes - do you need any help till then?" He asks and out of pure stubbornness I shake my head. Not even looking at him because I just know that bastards wearing some kind of sex-ass outfit to take Bucky out for date night - again.

I guess none of you actually know what our group does outside of avenging. Well...we're all dating. I'm the newest member of this weird rag-tag group of lovers and let me tell you guys, the sex? It's like fireworks. Every time one of them touches you-whoo and-

"Sam." Bucky's voice growls in my ear and shit me did I zone out whilst handling a baby. "You alright doll, you look a little....." I can almost hear the smirk as he rests his head on my shoulder and nips it. "Flustered." He mumbles. I gulp a little.

"Peter's just being cheeky is all" I stammer out, god this is why I cant inner monologue around here. The super-solider boys have a sixth sense to when you're horny and by god I'm not about to give up my first time alone with Peter to be fucked senseless. Bucky hums from behind me as he looks at Peter.

"You misbehaving for buh-ba little man?" He asks reaching round and stealing the kid from me and glancing at Steve, I follow him as they move out the room.

"I'll cancel the tickets." Steve mutters and I frown. "Don't even try and feel guilty Sam. We planned on cancelling any-ways, Bucky's having a bit of a panic day" he explains, I look at him then to Bucky and then back to him. He seems fine to me. "I know. He doesn't look any different but once you spend some more time with him you'll pick up on it." He promises and I nod awkwardly.

"Can you two stop being gross and lovey because I need someone to come help with the baby" Bucky calls over and Steve nudges me forward, I glare at him as he smirks at me walking off. "God, he's such a punk aint he Peter pan?" Bucky asks Peter, poking him on the tummy.

"So.." I mutter, sliding next to Bucky quietly. "How do you deal with screaming Peter? because I was about a minute away from just crying with him." I tell him and Bucky laughs a little shaking his head.

"Distractions are great. Ask him to find things for you. Organise the toys into a specific way. He's a bit of a bugger for it." He mutters and tickles Peter's side as the boy tries to escape his spot on the floor.

"I think its safe to say that I shouldn't be left alone with Peter." I mutter with a frown, Bucky's hand rests on my shoulder and I turn to look at him with a small hope he'd disagree, but he just nods his head sagely like I just stated a fact. "Gee, way to make a guy feel good 'bout himself Buck." I grumble and he just shoots me a grin.

"Oh shut up, the kid just needs some TLC and some TV and he'll be fine." He comments with a grin. "Probably doesn't help that I have it on good source that Clint fed the kid some sweets before leaving for work. You'd probably have a melt down by the time we'd come back" He jokes nudging me and I feel myself deflate a little.

"What Bucky's trying to say is, theres no way anyone can look after hyped Peter by themselves. Don't feel bad" Steve's voice echo's in and places a hand on my shoulder. "For now, lets pop on the TV, feed him and get him relaxed for the day." He says, eyes trained on Bucky who just grins at him.

So...yeah, a hopefully relaxing day with Bucky, Steve and Peter. Lets hope it turns out that way.