Guns and Mirrors

FORTY-TWO

♛Cameron Dawson ♛

Since we need to stay as far in the Kings territory as possible to prevent ourselves from running into Jack's guys that are looking far and wide for us, Ramiro agreed to let us stay with him considering we didn't have a place to go. I wasn't aware that the house he owned was so big and spacious... and beautiful. But I won't complain. Harley and I didn't have anywhere else to go and Ramiro is a great guy who I trust more than I care to admit.

"So here's your room. The bathroom is ensuite with a really fucking nice bathtub. You guys know where the kitchen and living room is so please make yourselves at home." Ramiro tells us as I drop our bags on the floor next to the bed with cream linen.

"Thank you Ray." Harley says and he offers her a smile.

"Are you sure you don't mind?" I ask once again. "I don't want to be intruding-"

"Nah," Ramiro shakes his head. "It was getting kind of annoying being in an empty house. I paid so much for this place for it to be empty most of the time. You're putting my investment to use." He offers me a grin that soothes the worry that was bundling in my chest. Glancing at the watch strapped to his wrist, Ramiro looks back up at us.

"I got to go. I'll catch you guys later. There's food in the fridge." He throws over his shoulder before leaving the room after we throw quick goodbyes at him. After I hear the front door shut, I avert my attention to Harley who is unzipping the duffle bag I packed all her clothes in. She silently begins pulling the clothing out, folding them decently before placing them in the cupboard behind her. However, I don't turn a blind eye to the way her hands tremble ferociously.

"Amado," I gently say, hoping to coax her out of the shell she's sucked herself into. But she ignores me and that's the immediate red flag that something is bothering her terribly. When she turns back to the bag to retrieve more clothing, I clutch her arm to stop her movement. Slowly, she looks up at me and when I see the glossy sheen to her eyes I frown.

"Are you worried about what happened today?" I ask and she shakes her head. "Then what's wrong? Are you scared of what Jack is going to do?" Again, she shakes her head and I can't seem to come up with another a reason. "Then what is it?"

"I pointed a gun at him." She snaps hoarsely. I know she doesn't mean to snap at me, she's just trying to reign in her emotions but it seems she's struggling to do that. She throws the shirt she was holding onto the bed before shaking her head, looking around the room. "I pointed a gun at my brother's head." She drops onto the bed, crouching down so that she rests her head in her hands. Her hair acts as a curtain so that I can't see her face anymore. Licking my lips, I crouch down in front of her, clasping my hands over hers and forcing her to look at me.

The internal turmoil is evident in her eyes and it hurts me to know that even when Cyrus doesn't intentionally break her heart, he still does. It's like she never wins.

"You did what you thought was right Harley. You can't be upset with yourself."

"I threatened to kill him, Danté. Kill him." She replies, her voice hard and bitter and her chest heaving up and down in either anger or hurt at the situation. "I threatened to kill my own brother." She closes her eyes, looking down and shutting her eyes tightly before softly whispering: "And I'm afraid I would have done it."

When Harley called to let me know that she was with Cyrus when she had to help Jee out of the warehouse because she was taken hostage, I wasn't told how exactly she did that and I never realised Harley had to threaten her brother to help Jee. But I'm running out of words to offer Harley comfort. How can I show her how to be okay with being human without forcing her to realise that that means being hurt and hurting? We're not normal twenty-odd year olds whose biggest stress is college, a pregnancy scare and when's the next party. Our lives mean we stress about whether we're going to get killed or taken, it's stressing about whether or not your family is safe from your enemy's hands. We're not living normal, ordinary lives and for that reason we're not going to be faced with the same, ordinary problems and therefore we can't resolve them with the same, ordinary solutions. This isn't how the world works. It isn't how our world works.