Stucky One Shots (Requests Open)

Oh no

Summary: Steve reads something he shouldn't have

After Bucky was reunited with Steve permanently, there was no doubt that he'd have questions about all that happened. However, he never asked them because he wasn't sure if Bucky was ready to talk about it.

At first, Bucky was extremely hesitant to move in with Steve. He was scared that the winter soldier would be unleashed and he would cause damage. Ever since he got settled in, the first few months, he was very cautious about every move he made. He always made sure he wasn't crossing a line with Steve and his home.

Steve didn't mind reassuring him though, because no matter what he went through. He doesn't have to go through it alone. Not anymore. If Bucky needs years of more reassurance, you bet Steve will give it to him.

Nights weren't the best to him. Sometimes, Bucky would have nightmares about all the stuff he's done and been through. Nevertheless, Steve was there for him because if it was the other way around. Bucky would do the same for him as well.

One night, when Bucky was asleep, Steve needed to talk to T'Challa about if he could get more medicine to help Bucky sleep better. But as he was looking for his phone, he found a red journal with a black star on the front of it. He held it in his hand as he walked back to their room.

Curious, he flipped through the pages. It was all of the things that Bucky did and went through. He kept flipping until he found a page that was in Russian. At that moment he was thankful he learned Russian. They were only a few words. So he began to read them out loud, but quietly so Bucky wouldn't wake up.

"Longing."
"Rusted."
"Seventeen."
"Daybreak."
"Furnace."
"Nine."
"Benign."
"Homecoming."
"One."
"Freight car."

When he finished, Bucky started moving, as if he were having a nightmare. That's what Steve thought was happening. So he thought nothing of it and tried to wake him up. Soon Bucky sat up and looked at him.

"Buck, you okay?"

"Ready to comply."

Then Bucky used his hand to wrap it around Steve's throat tightly. "Buck, stop." He said hoarsely. He used his legs to kick him off and Bucky fell backwards off the bed. Steve started to run towards the door, but felt a pair of hands grip around his ankles and pulled him back.

He used his arms to cover his face from the blows Bucky kept throwing to his face. Then, he got the upper hand and punched him back which caused him to topple over.

"Buck stop!" Bucky kept punching him repeatedly, over and over. Until his face was all bloody and busted up. You could barely recognize that it was Steve.

But Bucky did. He recognized him under all that blood. He was going to throw one more punch, but he came back to reality.

"Steve?" Bucky looked at Steve then at his fist that was still lingering in the air. "Steve? Oh no. No, no, no, no. Oh gosh. Steve?" He cried. "What did I do?"

Steve wasn't waking up. Bucky didn't know what else to do besides to call Tony for help.

"Tony?" He cried into the phone. "Bucky? What's wrong?" Tony asked. "I-it's Steve. Something happened and...he's not waking up. Can you please come help?"

"I'm on my way."

Bucky cried as he brought his arms around Steve's body. He cradled him in his arms rocking back and forth in tears.

"I'm so sorry Stevie."

Soon to Tony arrived with Banner. "What the hell happened?" He asked. "Explanations later. Steve needs our help." Banner stated as they managed to get him on the Quinjet.

Banner went with Steve along with one of their personal nurses, while Tony went to go talk to Bucky. He was covered in blood and his hands wouldn't stop shaking. His lip was still trembling, you could tell he was still shaken up.

"Do you wanna explain to me what happened?" Tony asked as he sat next to him and handed him something to clean his hands. "H-he found my journal. He said those words. H-he came out. I-I couldn't control it." He trembled. Tony knew exactly who he was talking about. "Have you guys talked to T'Challa about it? See what's going on?" Bucky shook his head,"No, we've been meaning to, but never got around to it."

"Okay well, I'm gonna give him a call. Just try to get some rest."

"Thank you."

Bucky couldn't sleep that night. He kept thinking to himself that if Steve dies, he would never be able to forgive himself. He already doesn't forgive himself right now. He kept thinking that Steve would be better off without him. Everything was better before he moved in, now he's in Steve's life again and he might die because of it. He shouldn't be in Steve's life.

Then, Banner walked in the room where he was laying. "He's okay. If he didn't have that serum he wouldn't have been so lucky. Now we just wait for him to wake up."

"C-can I see him?" Banner nodded and brought him to Steve.

His trembling hand went to grab Steve's as he laid there on the bed. He brought his hand up to his mouth.

"I'm so sorry Stevie. This is all my fault. I never meant to hurt you. Please please don't hate me. I love you so much." He sobbed.

Bucky fell asleep later on the couch that was set next to the bed. He cried himself to sleep that night while he was curled in a ball on the couch. Tony walked by and put a blanket over him while mumbling "it'll be okay". He slept for most of the day as well, so he wasn't awake when Steve woke up.

Soon, Bucky felt shaking, it was Tony. "Someone's been waiting for you." He said as he pointed to Steve. At first he didn't completely comprehend as he was still waking up, but once he did he jumped out of the couch and quickly went on the chair again.

"Steve." He smiled as he grabbed his hand. "I'm so so sorry darling. I-I didn't mean to hurt you. I couldn't control myself." He apologized as Steve wiped away a tear that was rolling down Bucky's cheek. "It's okay. Tony and Banner explained everything to me. I guess I shouldn't be nosy." He laughed lightly. "It's gonna okay Buck."

"When is he able to come home?" He asked Banner. "How you feeling Cap?" He asked. "Better than expected."

"Then you guys can go home." He told them. "Just take it easy Rogers." Tony commented.

At home, Bucky was acting weird. He was acting a little distant. Whenever Steve would try to hold his hand or be close, he'd distance himself away.

"Buck, are you okay?" He asked. "Yeah why?" He said as he furrowed his eyebrows. "Well, it's just that ever since we came home you've been really really distant and I just want to know if I did anything wrong?"

Bucky frowned. He didn't mean to act like that and he especially didn't mean to make Steve feel like that. "I'm sorry for being distant. I've been thinking ever since that incident happened that what if you're just better off without me? What if it happens again? You would be so much more safer if I wasn't in your life. I don't want to wake up one day and see your body laying there again and what if you're not so lucky next time."

"If there's a next time. We're gonna go see T'Challa in a couple days and he'll figure everything out. And if that happened to me and you weren't there, who would've called Tony? I'm alive because of you, so don't think that I'll be better off. Cause I won't be. And what about all those times I've had bad dreams, you were there. You made me feel safe and you always will. Okay? And you're crazy if you think I'm gonna let you just walk away. Please don't ever think that again. It's not true. I love you so much." Steve smiled as he pressed his lips against Bucky's.