Merry Little Christmas

07. Crumbs and Bites

December 9th, 1961

Inside Crumbs and Bites, it was warm and cozy. It reminded Isabella like home. She had never felt so much warmth in so long it was overwhelming. No longer did she feel regret or guilt over herself, but a sense of gratefulness and a decision that was the right choice. She stood and stared for a moment, admiring the bakery she had never been able to go into. But she was inside now, and more than ever she felt so happy and relaxed. 

It was like she couldn't move. Her body was fixed to the ground and her eyes and head moved around examining the place before she could make her next move. After she had finished, she inched her way over to the kitchen. 

It was beautiful. Full of pots and pans and ingredients she had never seen in a long time. Filled with love and joy despite how dark and lonely it looked like at nighttime, bare and with no people. The bakery had history with gleam and joy. The love was distinct and the place still carried the scent of warm baked goods that eased the air. It was perfect. 

She walked over to the fridge, opening it had a sense that shared a glimpse of the outside world. Out there is was cold and lonely. But here it was warm and friendly. She wished to stay, but she could only be here for so long. 

There were a whole fridge-full of supplies inside the bakery, suddenly hitting Isabella with new fear; if she took from inside the fridge, everyone would suspect someone stole it. But she pushed that thought away, as she realized no one would know it was her. 

So she grabbed a hands worth of supplies and materials to use for her experiment. It was one she knew by heart. It was her grandma's recipe: German Chocolate-Pecan Pie Bars. It was her favorite thing to bake as a Christmas tradition, then afterwards carried the tradition along after her Grandma Ellen had passed away. 

She set the ingredients along the counter in a line and tiptoed over to get the mixing spoons and measuring cups, then setting them across the counter as well. When she got there the place was spotless, so she had to be careful not to make a mess.

As she started to prepare the materials, she started to hum the Christmas tune from the other day, carefully swaying her body from side to side. She tilted a bag to release powdery flour cautiously into the bowl. 

It's Christmas time, in the city.

She hummed, stirring the wet mixture inside the bowl after she had poured the right ingredients inside. Everything went well, she had nothing to stop her, and her retentive memory had allowed her to remember the recipe from last year. All was well. 

She poured water in the bowl with the flour, kneading it with her hands. Her artful and intricate movements soothing her brain from everything that happened over the past couple of days. It was if time had stopped. And time does that sometimes. She longed for more time, but time goes by its time, and its pace. Time physically had no time to watch over, but time itself.

It had been almost two whole hours, but it seemed as if it had only been twenty minutes. She checked the time, surprised how it was already 2 AM. She shrugged the thought away, carelessly. 

She had to leave soon, but her dessert was almost finished. She tucked the big batch of messy ingredients into the oven. The next time she sees them, they would be a whole different masterpiece. 

Instead of allowing the oven to ring as usual, she had to make sure to open the door right when it hits the number one. She had to make as little noise as she could. She had to be careful not to fall asleep. 

So she was hunched over, looking at the ingredients form gradually into sweet treats. second after second, minute after minute, she started to doze off, but managed to keep a focused mind, and the eye on the ticking timer. If she closed her eyes the last second, it would be over. 

It would've been nice to close her eyes for just a minute. Just to doze off and forget about the world around her and to go to bed comfortably. In a warm environment under a roof until she was ready and charged up for the next day. But that was too risky. She would not dare close her eyes for a second, knowing herself she would go to sleep only to wake up to find herself in great danger. She couldn't afford having the finer things in life like that. Not now, anyways. She had a new life. She had to forget about the past and move on, even if it meant moving on to a harder, more extreme way of living. 

As the last couple seconds approached, Isabella kept a focused eye on the timer. Her eye never leaving the moving clock. Isabella put the mittens on her hands, getting ready to open the oven.

Five

Four

Three

Two

O-

She opened the oven and revealed the finished product. Isabella grabbed the tray and left it to cool. It looked delicious. Each and every bar filled with love and one-hundred percent effort. Each one beautifully crafted and unique in their own way. It smelled sugary, and her mouth salivated by the look of it. It smelled exactly how she remembered it to smell like. Divine. 

Isabella got plastic bags from the pantry and put the treats inside. She put the flour back inside the pantry, gave the bowls and spoons a good wash before putting them away, and the rest of the ingredients inside the refrigerator. And even after that, she took a good last glance at Crumbs and Bites, wondering if would be the first and last time she would be able to go inside there again. She opened the door behind her and walked out, making sure no one had taken note of what she had done. 

When Isabella had gotten back to her family, they were asleep. Mr. and Mrs. McCarthy looked pale and little Niall looked tiny. She sat down with them, hiding the treats inside her jacket pocket. It was cold again, and looking to the left of her, the view of Crumbs and Bites, the tiny bakery from down the street looked cheery and warm as it could be. 

She pulled the blanket farther up to her arms, closed her eyes, and drifted to sleep.