Merry Little Christmas

08. Craved

December 10th, 1961

Today was scarce. She woke up happily. She woke up feeling no regret nor guilt. Today, Isabella woke up to the twinkling music of Jingle bells as the soft snow gingerly fell across her cheek. Her hair was splayed across the cement. As she tried to get up, the heavy snow on her hair kept her down. She giggled softly. Unusually, the cool breeze didn't bother her. And she was looking at Christmas on a whole different perspective.

She liked this. Waking up to the feeling of happiness. Waking up with hope-because for so long she didn't get to enjoy the experience. Once again, the surly New Yorkers  looked at her with great disdain. They looked at her, and saw nothing; a nonentity. But out of the blue, when they least expected it, she was strong. She had a family, who takes care of each other, and protects each other at all costs. They didn't need the fanciest necklace or the most expensive car. They were a family; it was just part of the atmosphere. And it was all they ever needed. 

They were held hostage; the weakness inside of them had effected them greatly. Ravaging every interior part of their bodies, without any certainty that they would eventually build back up. They were stronger then, but happier now. 

Isabella was the first to get up. But though she was last to get to bed, she was energetic and happy. The pain in her belly was gone, to some extent. She had this feeling for days now, she had probably just gotten used to it. It must've felt terrible; unable to know what life without pain felt like, thinking that pain was now normal. 

The girl turned to her side, examining her sleeping family. Then carefully, she took out the bag of Chocolate Pecan-Pie bars from out of her pocket, not knowing what to do next. She wanted to open the bag and smell the warm aroma of the bars she had experienced the night before. She wanted to take a small bite; just enough so her taste buds could taste the treat thoroughly. But she wanted to wait for the perfect moment. So she stuffed the bag back into her jacket pocket, and continued to watch the newly formed snow plummet slowly towards the ground, along with the rest.

Things were awfully boring for Isabella. As like most days. But now that she realized there was something better to do than to sit down day and night in the cold winter, boredom struck more than before. She looked to the side. The side where the bakery still sat, waiting for her existence. She didn't know what time it was but she could go without time. It was morning, and the bakery was opened up for business. She wanted to come back but she didn't know when. 

For a while she was all by herself. Until finally, Helena McCarthy stirred inside her blanket and came back to reality. 

"Good morning Mama," Isabella yawned after she say Mrs. McCarthy do the same thing before. She stuffed her hands into her pockets, holding the bag of goodies inside. Now was the time. 

"Good morning, Isabella! When did you wake up?" She questioned.

She hesitated. "Not sure. But I want to show you something." She said bravely. 

"What is it?"

Isabella slowly took the bag out of her pocket, revealing them to her. "They're mine. I made them." Mama looked confused. "I-I sneaked into the bakery last night, and I baked them." 

"Oh dear me," Mama whispered, looking frightened. "Isabella, why would you do that?" 

She shoved them quickly back into her pocket. "I didn't get caught! And we have food now."

"What are they?" 

"What?" She asked, confused.

"What did you make?" Mama cleared up.

"T-they're German Chocolate Pecan-Pie bars," Isabella added, "wait are you mad?" 

She sighed deeply. "As much as I hate what you did, no I'm not. At this point, we are kind of desperate."

Isabella smiled, opening the bag and handing a bar to Mama. She watched her touch the goody to her nose, smelling the faint aroma that the wind was slowly washing away. Isabella watched as she put the whole thing inside her mouth, chewing it inside her mouth from top to bottom. And after, she watched as she licked her lips, then smiled. 

"This is exactly how I remembered it to taste like. It's delicious."

"Thanks." Isabella blushed. 

 ❆ 

The whole family was awake now, it was nighttime, and the bars were long gone. Isabella craved to go inside of the bakery once more; just to come inside, not to bake, but just to feel. To feel she was finally back at home. The warmth and the comfort she needed for so long was right at her fingertips, yet so far away. She needed to get there now.

Her family, on the other hand craved her treats. The more they realized that they should not take this for granted, the more they wanted the treats. It was a cycle; one they loved. Isabella would get to bake. The family would not starve. It was perfect. 

"I'll be careful." Isabella promised.

"You better be." Papa said with a solemn look on his face.

"I will, and I'm not going to do this everyday." She reassured him.

Papa sighed. "I know. It's just.... be careful."

Mama chimed in. "And if you get caught. It will be okay." 

Isabella nodded, fumbling with her zipper, attempting to zip her jacket up.

"Go on," Niall whispered. "Go make us some bars." 

She smiled, jumping up from her spot. "Okay," She ran towards the bakery slowly, making sure no person could recognize her face.

The Crumbs and Bites sign held brightly above the building, blinding her as she walked towards the door. She reached for the door knob, and attempted to push it open. 

"Darn it," She whispered to herself. "It's locked." She paced around in circled thinking of how to unlock the door. She looked inside the keyhole, wondering what thing could be able to unlock it. She needed something sharp. But what?

Isabella looked on the floor endlessly, desperate to find a pointy figure to unlock the door, but it was no use. She looked through bushes and inside her pocket, but nothing was there. Until she checked around the outside of the Bakery; a little sign on the wall, hung by a little pointy clip that could work to unlock the door. She smiled, and grabbed the pin, racing to put it inside the keyhole. 

Click.

She turned the knob, and opened the door.