Connected

Chapter 10: Healing

"If I believe my days to have been assigned to me,

By a Being whose goodness is described as love,

Then wouldn't it be just for me to hope?

For my struggles have been considered and understood,

And they aren't without purpose."

"Do you remember me bringing you outside of this room?" Jacob asked and Leah nodded her head as a yes.

It was the last thing she remembered before finding herself trapped in the arena of her subconscious. Well, at least that's how she could make sense of what happened. When she heard Jacob's summons, his voice lulled her eyes to close and when she opened them again she was already in this room lying on this bed.

Jacob was there holding her hand when she regained consciousness. Feeling those sturdy, and warm hands of his made her shoulders tremble for without warning her mind had started replaying her memory of jumping and falling then writhing in pain atop the hood of a car.

Vividly it played in her brain, battering her conscience terribly and giving her soul unrest.

"Jacob, I-I tried to kill myself. How-how could I?" She said her face screwed in regret. "It's-it's repugnant."

Leah was now cognizant of the fact that she had done a dreadful thing to herself. Her mind recalling the truth so clearly, in complete detail making her discern how she had self-sabotage herself by isolating herself and refusing the help being offered to her.

She kept thinking that no one could understand her when in fact she was the one who separated herself from everyone else. Leah doesn't want to admit it, but she simply took pride in her resentment of life. She considered it too sacred to surrender. It's what fueled her to go on and to break free from it is simply terrifying because she felt she would be left empty and lifeless without it.

"Shhh," Jacob calmed her straightening the lines that had formed on her forehead. "You're alive that's what matters."

"Yes, but for how long!" Leah exclaimed already in tears. "I can't even trust myself anymore."

Jacob inaudibly exhaled. "Ah yes, let's work on that."

Leah wiped her eyes dry enabling her perception to improve so that she started distinguishing some other elements in her surroundings when she caught sight of ­­­­­­–

"Ahhh!" She screamed at the top of her voice, nearly rolling out of the bed if it wasn't because of Jacob's quick response of holding her steady. She felt her blood run cold in an instant. "What is this?"

Unfazed Jacob answered, "It's your body."

"I know it's my body. Why is it here and why am I beside it?" Leah's questions shot out of her mouth fast, her whitened face turning to Jacob seeking a valid explanation from him.

So that's how she was put in this position of listening to Jacob recount the events that took place while she was unconscious. But not until she had calmed down. He sat her upright on the bed, leaning on the wooden headboard that was against the wall.

Then he sat down on the bed and facing her he started, "After they've rushed your body to the O.R, it stayed there for almost twelve hours. 

Seeing how unconscious you already were I thought it best to bring you inside the room while waiting for you to wake up and your body to return.