Possession Of His | 18+

Chapter Eleven

Kimberly P O V:

I really did not want to get out of bed.

This morning I woke up feeling tired and stressed, the three hours of sleep I managed to get last night was not helping me feel any better. My mind was running rampant with lingering reminders of what me and Nathan had done and now I was left to wallow in a mixture of regret and lust. I groan as I turn over onto my stomach, my screams being muffled against the fabric of my pillow as I stuff my face against it. I wanted to avoid him for the rest of my life, to erase all memories of what happened and pretend that everything was normal again.

Was this entire situation ever normal to begin with though? I mean I was living with a man I didn't know and not just any man at that. I knew from the moment I saw him that I had an instant attraction, but any woman would with the way he looked. He wasn't the unconventional sort of handsome, he was attractive in the way that you would physically stop on the side of the street to admire him. That's why I always ignored those strange feelings I had towards him because at the end of the day, I never thought I would actually act on any of my feelings.

As soon as he kissed me, I caved. There was no part of me that didn't want to kiss him back, nor were there any regrets swarming my mind in the moment. I made that choice and by doing it, I realized I had been ignoring all these conflicting emotions that have slowly been building up inside. But even now, I can't decipher what it is that I am feeling. All I know is that he kissed me, and I liked it, I liked it a lot more than I probably should have.

I was just happy that it didn't go any further than that. I didn't allow it to. Somehow, through my daze, I had managed to gain some sort of reason and clumsily pushed him away. We both stared at each other, our chests heaving as we tried to catch our breaths. It was only then in that quiet moment that I ran out of the room and into my own, my face already beginning to turn red as my actions were soon catching up to me.

I begrudgingly get out of bed after a while of thrashing about in frustration, no doubt looking a mess as I prepare for a well-needed shower. My emotions continue to switch between dread, excitement, and confusion as I scrub shampoo deep into my scalp, desperately trying to cleanse my thoughts of all things Nathan Russo.

I get ready into an outfit similar to what I wore on the first day, only this time the top and skirt were colored a matching baby blue and white. I take extra notice of my makeup and hair, going out of my way to curl my brown locks before placing them up into a bun with two curled pieces framing my face at the front. I don't know why I was feeling so conscious of how I looked, I can't recall ever caring so much. But today, I was feeling a whole new level of different, I wasn't quite sure if it was a good or bad thing just yet.

I make my way downstairs whilst mentally trying to prepare myself to see him. I don't even notice I'm holding my breath as I walk into the kitchen, it's only when I realize he wasn't there that I allow myself to breathe. I don't know why I felt so disappointed to not see him, I should feel relieved, all I've wanted to do since last night was avoid him. God, it's like my emotions are having a constant battle in deciding how to feel every second. I was letting him dictate my every move, and he had managed to do it with a single kiss.

I'm so pathetic.

"Oh, good morning love," I return Jane's welcoming smile as I walk further into the kitchen, trying not to let my disappointment show on my face as I take a seat at the counter.

"Good morning," I reply as I place my bag on top of the white marble in front of me.

"I've made pancakes again, I know they're your favorite," Jane offers me a smile over her shoulder before going back to the pancakes in front of her. "You seem like you need them this morning, what's with the long face?" She questions.