Spaces Between Us- Hold All Our Secrets (ZARRY AU)

So much that it hurts (20)

Zayn's POV

I had decided that this was the only way out. My dad hated me. My sisters only knew the wrong version of me. The one that pretended to be all shiny and happy while on the inside it was dying. And my mom, well she did love me. But her love wasn't enough to make me stay. She didn't really need me. It's the opposite actually. She would be having less problems without me. The only person that I felt sorry for leaving without saying goodbye to, was Liam. He had been such a good friend, the best I could have wished for. But even he couldn't make me stay.

I had to get away. Leave this broken and shattered world that didn't need a lost soul like mine.

If only I had never gotten into this messed up drug business, none of this would have happened. In all honesty, I never even had the intentions to get involved in drugs. But we couldn't always decide what was meant to be. Maye fate had wanted this for me, like it wanted me to die now. This was the doomed destiny cursed up on me.

I was only wearing light clothing, shivering while walking through the empty streets of London. My feet were slowly carrying me to my final destination. My whole body was shaking from the coldness and fear, but I tried to shrug it off and started quickening my pace.

Only a few more minutes. This would be my last time walking, my feet touching the ground. This would be my last time breathing in the morning air, hearing the cars passing by.

When I had finally reached my destination I couldn't help but felt scared. I wasn't gonna back out though. I wasn't a coward.

Walking down to the edge I stared down into the deep and darkened water.

I quickly stepped back from the edge, taking in a deep breath. This was scarier than I thought. Trying to distract myself from the spreading fear in my bones, I looked up to the sky. Staring at the shimmering stars, lighting up the night sky. What a beautiful sight. And I couldn't help but think of the last time I really admired the stars. It had been on Harry's and my first date.

"I like looking at the stars too. They seem so far away and close at the same time, as if you could reach for them, although they are millions of kilometers away", he spoke and I nodded along, agreeing with what he was saying.

"I wonder what lies up there?", Harry said, his head directed at the clouds, "I mean there are so many more galaxies, planets, that we haven't discovered yet, that we know nothing about. Imagine if there was another earth somewhere? Imagine people from that planet wondering about the exact same thing as we do. It's fascinating to think about."

"Sorry I didn't mean to bore you with my rambling"...

Spending this day with him had been one of the best experiences of my life.

Actually every day I had been with him was wonderful in its own way. He used to just waltz in and wipe me right off my feet. Only a little smile and I was gone. A kiss. A touch. I was gone. So gone for him.

Harry.

The only person I ever loved. The only person I would always love. Even if he didn't return my feelings.

Right now I wished I could see him just one more time. Hear his laughter, hold his hand, trace along his soft skin, poke his adorable dimples and kiss him until we both forgot how to breathe.

But my time was up! I had my chance and I ruined it. There had been a light at the end of the tunnel but now there was only darkness.

Harry's POV

"Hello? Who the hell is this?", Liam shouted and I had never been more relieved about someone picking up his phone.