What I see.

Dec. 17 2019

I thought it would be rare that I would update on this story but I guess I should have thought better.

Siblings fight & Siblings get along...

My mom says otherwise.

She says that sisters aren't suppose to fight and/or argue with each other...

She says she has never argued with her sister...

But we still end up fighting each other more than we could ever even say a compliment to each other.

Let me put it like this...

If we ever start fighting we don't know who or how it started but what I do know is...

She insults me the most...

I always want to be by her side, give her so many hugs bit she pushes me away...

I want to hang out with her but she doesn't want me around so I don't embarrass her...

I basically treat her like my cooler older sister, funny thing is she's my little sister.

---

I read in this book called, 'How Good is Good Enough by Andy Stanley', that it's only human to think that if we do good we expect something good back...

In my case what I want is if I give love and care for someone I expect some back...

Some people want material things in return for things but I never want material things...

All I want is the love, care, compassion of my friends and family...

The only person in my family that I know really shows that to me is my dad...

But I'm bound to be unlucky cause I feel like I barely see him since he works a lot.

I barely know anyone that wouldn't want material things, even if I did I think friendship doesn't last long...

To bad nothing last forever, like the best moments of our lives, or the people love and care for...

This also makes me wonder what is a real friend? Someone who gets you? Someone to help through things?

I find them rare in my world cause I don't want to get to close to a person...

If they have to leave then I don't want that to hurt, I have a weak/soft heart, if you were to ask anyone who knows me they answer like this;

·"She's really nice..."
·"She's kinda quite..."
·"She's a great friend..."

And anything between those lines...

That's what they think but I don't even know what I'm like.

(Sorry if this is confusing and random but it is what it is.)