Seasons in the Sun - Snufmin Collection (Mostly)

Yearly Torture of our Hearts ❥/❁

     If anyone had asked, he would say the departure was the hardest part everytime the final leaves would fall from the branches of sleeping trees. Everytime the first fleck of snow would descend from the heavens above, dropping onto the Earth, still much too warm to hold it. There it would be soaked up by the ground, just as the tears of someone dear to his heart.

     Just because the troll understood, didn't make it all the more easier for him. And that, Snufkin understood. Perhaps it made the goodbye easier, but it never did anything to dull the pain. He knew the vagabond was meant to be free, just as the wind and the rain. Just as the ocean waves and sunlight. It was Snufkin's nature, to be with Nature.

     Even if it hurt the Mumrik just as much as the troll. Perhaps worse, in a way.

      And that's why, if he were to say the departure was the worst, it'd be a downright lie. Painful, yes, but lately, every moment with his dear friend brought him confused feelings that he knew, but couldn't understand. Joy within his company, happiness to see his smile and hear his laugh, comfort in his ability to listen and do his best to understand the traveller and although it didn't happen all the time, there was still the appreciation. But, there was also much sorrow and pain with the same things that brought him delight. The same laugh that warmed him left him cold. Those beautiful eyes, so much like the ocean he adored, brought him comfort just by looking, yet also cut him deep like a blade, fracturing his heart.

     It was because he knew that the melody his heart sung for the troll, could never be a duet.

     For the lovely and wonderful Moomintroll's heart was held by another.

      One who could give him everything he wanted far better than he ever could.

      For all Snufkin ever did was hurt him. He saw it everytime those bitter winds of Winter came, stinging his eyes just as the tears did his Moomintroll's. He could see his friend's heart break, even if only a little, to see the vagabond go, even if he wanted him to go, to be the free Mumrik he was meant to be. Because, he also wanted him to stay... Even though he knew that could never happen.

      So, that is why this was the hardest time of all. When the warmth of Spring was on the wind, touching the blanket of snow and melting it away, carrying it to the ground to water the ever vibrant blooms of the valley. When the sun shone with such radiance that it blinded the eye to even gaze at the sky and when sleeping bodies would wake to bring life to the ever beautiful Moomin Valley. A place that he'd consider a home, if he ever deserved such a thing.

     But, he did not. At least he felt he didn't.

     His gaze swept from the top of the Lonely Mountains, certainly the best spot to see the entirety of the wonderous place he found his feet taking him once Spring neared. To the delightful people who didn't treat him like an oddity, well, most didn't, and instead a friend, again, most did. Even here, he could see a speck in the distance, one very blue against the still white that covered the world, though he knew it wouldn't be long. And once the snow had left, a different sort of white will emerge... One he had been oh so lucky to have met.

     Well... Perhaps not entirely, considering these whirling feelings inside himself. He wasn't too sure when they had started, but it felt as though it all began not long after their initial meeting. Oh, how hard he had fallen for him. Not all at once, of course, but the pieces were quick to gather, much like how a pebble can cause a rockslide.

     It was... Strange. Despite how it all made him feel, how it tore him apart...

      It also made him feel quite alive.