Why Me? (GxG)✅

5

An: where it's written in italics, it's just a dream/nightmare or a memory. Also this chapter includes some self harm so if it makes you uncomfortable skip the italics.
Enjoy😊❤️🌠

---------------------------------------------------------

"Do you know what you are?"
I shake my head 'no'.
Why is she screaming at me like this? I'm only 13. What did I do?

"You are a selfish bitch. You care only about yourself. No one else. That's why your father works his life away. He can't stand to be anywhere near you. No one loves you. No one. Not me. Not your sister. Not your father. No one. We all hate you."
"No mom, you're lying. Daddy loves me and so does grandma and grandpa." she starts laughing.
"They don't love you. They're all waiting for the day you die." I didn't want to hear anymore. I got up and ran to my room where I locked the door.
I took out my blade. Hidden in my wallet, it hasn't let me down before. 7 new stripes on my left arm.

'They're all waiting for the day you die' my mother's words play over and over in my head. This is where my depression started. I go to my parents room and find my mother passed out. Even though she was drunk, what she said was the truth. I am selfish. Nobody loves me.
I take my dad's pills and go up to my room. My mother is passed out. My sister is with my dad at the ice cream shop. I'm all alone. As I've always been. As I'll always be.
I empty the bottle. It's only 11 pills but I'm small so it should work. It should kill me. I take all 11 and gulp down some water. I close my eyes for the last time.

-------------------end of nightmare---------------

I wake up screaming.
Someone's shaking my leg.
I'm sweating.
Panting.

When I look up I see that Brooke is holding my leg. She must have heard all the screaming.

"Hey Amy. Are you okay? I heard screaming and I got worried that something happened." she looks concerned.

I pull her into a hug.

"Thank you for checking up on me. I'm fine." she pulls away and looks into my eyes.
"I'm sorry for what I said earlier. You are not a selfish person. At all."
"But you see, you are right. I am a selfish person." I bow my head, not wanting her to see me.

"Look at me."
I keep my head down.

I feel her fingers under my chin lifting my head up.
"You are not selfish. I don't want to hear any of this shit again. Okay? You're kind and you took in two strangers without asking for anything in return."

I nod. Staring at her now I notice the bruises on her face.
I reach out and touch them.

"What happened?" I whisper. She leans into my touch slightly.

"My girlfriend. She's abusive. I was dating her when my parents died earlier this year. I had no money. No other family so she took us in. She pays for Bev's school. Our clothes and food and our house but she has anger issues so I'm usually her punching bag. The day before school opened I was taking a nap and I said your name in my sleep and she got pissed and she hit me and when Bev tried to help she hit her too... "

At this point she's crying so I pull her into me and let her cry on my chest. I kiss her head multiple times until she calms down.
"It was my fault anyways." she says solemnly. It makes me so mad that she thinks that.

"No. It was never your fault and it can never be your fault. No one should ever lay their hand on a woman, or anyone elsezno matter what. Especially if that women is as beautiful and strong and kind and perfect as you are. Understand?"

She nods and I see the corner of her lips turn upward just a tiny bit.
"You see. You aren't selfish. You are so kind and that is why in less than a full day of knowing you, I've already started falling for you."

I smile.
She closes her eyes and leans in, I do the same.
We are an inch apart when my phone pings with a notification. I look down, embarrassed.
"I'm sorry." I say and she shakes her head and leans into my neck.

I check it and it's my sister.

Chrisy: So mum and dad leave at 5 tomorrow afternoon so I'll be there at about 6 okay?
Me: Chrisy it's 2 in the morning, what are you doing up?
Chrisy: I needed to tell you. What are you doing up?
Me: I'm going to bed. Night
Chrisy: night

"I'm sorry that. Now where were we?" I lean in but she pulls back.
"It's fine and it's late I'm gonna go sleep." she's hesitant now and I'm not going to push her.

"Can you stay here? You don't have to if you don't want to." she smiles.

"I would love to stay" she climbs in and so do I and we cuddle until we both fall asleep.

———

My alarm goes off at 5. It doesn't wake Brooke up so I switch it off then head off to wake up Bev. I tell her to shower and put on a robe then come to my room.

I head back to my room to shower and when I get out I see Brooke awake. Thankfully I had on a robe.

"Hey why didn't you wake me up?"
"You need your sleep, plus I didn't think I'd need to. You don't work right?"
"Yeah I don't but I could have made you and Bev breakfast or something."
Her eyes go wide like she suddenly remembered something.
"Oh my God. Did you wake her up? We need to wake her up!"
She's panicking. It's cute. I start taking out my clothes for the day while talking to her.

"I did. She's in the shower. There's no food so I'll leave cash and you can get take out for yourself and I'll get Bev and I breakfast. I'm leaving early today because my sister is coming over, I'll be home at about 1 and I'll bring Bev with me. So take something out of my closet and at about 6 we can all go to dinner okay? When your sister comes in, tell her to pick an outfit. I'm gonna go change."

"Okay. But when you get home we need to talk okay? About your nightmare." Oh God. I thought I could have avoided it. None of the people I've been with have ever asked me about them.

"Alright. But when your sister is done go back to sleep." I go into the bathroom and change and when I come out, I see Brooke fast asleep. I grab my keys, wallet and phone. I leave $200 on the dresser and I take out my backup phone and put my number in it. I leave it on the dresser and kiss Brooke on the forehead before I leave.
Bev and I leave and because we're early, we stop at McDonald's for breakfast before heading to school.