𝐴𝑛𝑔𝑒𝑙 • 𝑍𝑎𝑏𝑑𝑖𝑒𝑙 𝑑𝑒 𝐽𝑒𝑠𝑢́𝑠

38

I get out of the shower seeing fresh underwear, a grey hoodie and sweatpants already on the washstand. I put them on and dry my hair a little bit with a towel. I get out of the bathroom seeing Zabdiel sitting on the bed, with his elbows on his knees, looking at the ground. He looks up at me as I get closer and I see his red puffy eyes.

-Hey, are you okay? - I ask sitting by his side and he snorts still looking at the ground. -Zab...

-I could've hurt you. - He whispers and I sit on his lap, cupping his face with my hands making him finally look at me again. His red eyes closed and I whispered.

-Look at me. - I say and he didn't react. -Zab, look at me. - He opens his eyes and I rub my thumbs on his
cheeks. - You didn't.

-I could've.

-Im okay. - I whisper and he looks down shaking his head.

-Angel you were shaking. - He says raising his voice and I feel my eyes water with the thought of it. I open and close my eyes quickly without him noticing, letting my tears dry. After a few minutes he looks at me. - See? You don't even know what to say.

-What do you want me to say? - I whisper and he finally looks at me in the eyes. I clench my jaw trying not to get emotional as he speaks.

-Tell me you weren't scared of me. - I stay silent for a few seconds and when I open my mouth to speak, he says. - I should leave.

-No. Stay, please.

-You should go home too.

-Zabdiel, are you serious?

-Im not good for you, Angel. - He shakes his head standing up making me leave his lap.

-Zab what are you doing? - I whisper and he stops by the door.

-We need a few days without each other. - He says as he closes the door and I let my body fall into the bed.

I let the tears run down my face as I put my sneakers on. The sneakers he bought me. I rub my sleeves over my eyes trying to get rid of the tears and get out of Chris's room, closing the door behind me. I go down the stairs looking down hoping no one would notice but a hand stops me as I unlock the door to leave.

-Angel? - I hear Richard's voice say and slowly turn my head back. He opens his eyes widely probably noticing how hardly I'm trying to I'm hold back my tears and whispers. - What happened?

-Nothing, I just need to go. I'll talk to you at school. - I say quickly turning around again and starting to walk but his hand stops me again. The tears start to run my face again and I beg him. - Please, let me go. I just need to be alone. - A sob leaves my mouth and he lets go of my arm.

-Im one call away. - He says wiping my tears and I nod. - I love you babygirl.

-I love you too Rich. - I whisper finally leaving the house.

I walk for about twenty-five minutes before stopping at a park. The park he always takes Peanut to. I sit in the grass leaning my head in one of the few walls and close my eyes letting my emotions take over once again. I feel the sobs coming and curl up into a ball hoping I would disappear from the world for a moment. I feel something hit my arm and open my eyes seeing three kids covering their wide open mouths. I give them a little smile before throwing their ball back and getting up making my way home.

I stop at my front door, wiping off my tears and a long breath leaves my lips knowing my mom would be home. I open the door and see her in the kitchen.

-Hi. - I say not looking at her and going straight for the stairs, not wanting her to notice how much of a mess I am right now.

-Baby, the dinner is almost ready. - She says raising her voice so that I heard her from the top of the stairs.

-I already ate with the guys, I'm not hungry. I'm going to sleep, I'm really tired. - I say hoping she wouldn't ask any questions.

-Goodnight then. - She says a little quieter and I breath heavily not knowing if I was happy that she didn't nag or unhappy that I made her sad.

I lay under my covers, putting my headphones on and closing my eyes trying to sleep. My music stops for a few seconds and I look at my phone seeing a text from Richard.

"Whatever Zabdiel did, he's an idiot, he didn't mean it and he loves you"

I lock my phone and close my eyes as I feel the tears trying to escape from my eyes.

I look at my phone checking the time. 1am. I grunt putting my pillow over my head realising Ive been trying to fall asleep for over five hours. I get up and go downstairs grabbing a chocolate bar and a cup of milk and sitting on the couch, turning on the TV. After three episodes of CSI, I lay on the couch snuggling as a need of rest hits my body.

-Angel. - I open my eyes slowly hearing my mom's voice and I moan as I feel my back ache. -Love, if you want to go to class, you should wake up.

I get up slowly as my whole body hurt and I hug her. She hugs me tightly not letting me go until I do.

-Are you okay? - She asks already knowing the answer.

-Yeah.