Story time - I have a serious problem

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So...how can I say this without looking like a pervert?
I am addicted to porn and I hate that I like it.

I don't even need to explain me. An addiction is an addiction. It's bad!

I wake up, I think in porn.
I am in school, I think in porn.
I go to sleep, I think and dream porn.
Even in the church I think in porn!
I think to much in this that I can't even study right.

I am getting really tired of looking around checking if anyone can see my phone.

Stupid time when my mom told me what death was. That shit traumatized me so bad that I can't sleep without my personal therapy: porn and love.

I have found other ways to be able to sleep, but the fact that I am single since I was born doesn't help at all.

I am a romantic person who is always thinking in love (even before I found what porn was it) so...I don't know. I just want a lover.

Aaahhh I which that someday I'll get through this.

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