does anyone know how to work twitter?

the stabbenings

beter @beterbarker
things are Not Good™

May the force be with you @guyinthechair
What did you do?

beter @beterbarker
mistakes

mj @yourenotallowed
@stark come get your man

Tony Stark @stark
@beterbarker Peter, what did you do this time?

beter @beterbarker
not good things. mistakes have been made.

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Private Message
Tony Stark and beter

Tony Stark: Kid, what happened.

beter: knives are weird

Tony Stark: Is that all?

beter: anyway ones in my leg

Tony Stark: Jesus Christ, kid. Can you describe who stabbed you?

beter: yeah he wasn't very friendly

Tony Stark: Just come home

beter: okie

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Avengers Updates @AvengersUpdates
In recent news, @stark now follows @beterbarker, a seemingly random highschool student. Could this person be Tony Stark's secret child?

Spiderman Updates! @smupdates
Despite reports of being stabbed in the leg, Spiderman was seen swinging into Stark Towers!

gus @augustgloop
uh yeah he practically lives there now

Pepper Potts @potts
@stark @beterbarker You two are a nightmare. No more social media until I clean this up.

beter @beterbarker
@potts sorry Ms. Potts

lo @logansjam
wow i wish pepper potts could ground me

ro @selfhatredcentral
@logansjam stop being thirsty on main

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beter @beterbarker
@potatomechanic are you coming back any time soon?

harley? @potatomechanic
@beterbarker is tony being mean to you again?

beter @beterbarker
@potatomechanic yeah he closed off my access to the labs and i can't make us those lightsabers

harley? @potatomechanic
@stark he's my only friend. don't make him sad

Tin Can Man @stank
He changed my name, he deserves this.

beter @beterbarker
jokes on you the only thing i deserve is death.

harley? @potatomechanic
darlin,,,, no

lea @spiderstan
Is anyone going to acknowledge that Tony Stark knows another random kid?

ari @nonbinaryroyalty
lol apparently

harley? @potatomechanic
he crashed into my garage when i was eleven and he felt guilty for it so here i am

ari @nonbinaryroyalty
@stank fact check?

Tin Can Man @stank
Unfortunately, yes.

ari @nonbinaryroyalty
Great news, everybody! Tony Stark replied to me and I have a will to live!

Caw Caw Bitch @bestbird
@beterbarker please don't change the names back, I physically cannot live without this name.

beter @beterbarker
you're welcome :)

brochacho barnes @metal.arm
I have no idea what this means

snek @mischeifmanaged
I, personally, think mine's amazing

Tin Can Man @stank
Peter, don't listen to him. Change them back.

Caw Caw Bitch @bestbird
Sir, that is my emotional support username

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beter @beterbarker
on an unrelated note, did you know that most laughs we hear on tv were recorded in the 1650s so most of the people we hear are dead!

mj @yourenotallowed
This may be an interesting fact to most people, but I hear dead people laughing all the time.

beter @beterbarker
hey, mj.

beter @beterbarker
what the fuck does that mean?