Do or Die (Jackal Squad Oneshots)

Unfading Memories

Infinite just couldn't quite come to terms with the pain. It had been five, maybe six months since it had happened... he couldn't quite remember through the fuzz of illusions and glitches that muddled his mind and heart. All he could clearly see was the hallway he was storming through; empty as ever, and full of an eerie, violent light that provided no escape from his unalterable reality.

His squad was dead. And it was his fault.

Why were you so stupid? If you'd just listened to her, they'd still be alive! Infinite scolded himself endlessly, with various different phases highlighting what he had lost, some more personal than others. You would've been married to the love of your life and could have had a child on the way now! How could you have done this to yourself?! To them?!

He halted his storming advance through the darkened hall at a door, then shoved it open and stormed into a small room. Slamming the door behind him, he ripped off the metal mask that concealed his identity.

A tall, thin window stood across the room from him, with a bed to his left, and a mirror attached to a cluttered table on his right, a little closer to the window than the bed. A small, less cluttered desk set right next to the table, with a box underneath it. The room was long instead of wide and was small compared to the other huge rooms in the building.

The table's clutter considered of several daggers, a shotgun (or maybe two... he couldn't quite remember where one of the guns were,) and various papers and other trinkets.

He'd lived here for months, ever since he had fully joined forces with Eggman after the incident at Aqua Road... the incident that took the lives of the only people who had ever loved him... He had chosen to live in this small space to feel like he was in control, turning down various large rooms offered to him. Infinite wanted to convince himself that something in his life was still stable, that he was still in control of something; but the jackal knew the truth: he had no control over himself or anything he touched.

Pull yourself together, Infinite! He placed his mask onto the smaller desk and sighed, then growled as his sigh was much more mournful that he wanted to admit.

The Phantom Ruby implanted in his chest glinted with a lethal, yet intriguing, streak of red light.

Infinite's lips parted slightly to reveal his sharp fangs as he stretched out his palm, beginning to summon the Ruby's power, then slammed the illusions into his chest once he deemed he had summoned enough.

His emotional pain dulled almost instantly, but his vision became blurry and he stumbled.

"Ugh, Going to have to remember to sit down before I attempt that once more." Infinite felt around the tiny space to find his bed, then flopped down onto it until his head felt clear and he was able to see again. He had no idea what inflicting his power onto his own brain would do to him, other than that it messed up his memory, but the result of eased pain was worth it to him.

Tampering with his own head was the only way to make Infinite feel at ease. He was alone, without anyone looking out for him or his needs.

To Eggman he was just a vicious killer, to the world he was the same thing, only violent and cold-hearted were the adjectives used... no one thought of him as anything but a killer and someone whose life was worthless.

Infinite once had people who cared about him, who thought he was more than just what his rough exterior portrayed, and he sent them to their own destruction. Now, he could never get them back; nothing eased the pain, even killing others hurt him after a while; seeing the living gather around their dead and mourn like he did several months before.