Speculation

Speculation - Chapter 2

chapter 2

Oh how he did remember, those early years.....The first winter was hard and vividly John remembered even now with so many years gone by, the first bitterly cold day.

(16 years ago)

The three mile walk home seemed endless as snow and ice stung his face and the gusting north wind pierced him through. His only thought was that soon he would be warmed by the stove and the aching gnawing pain in his numb hands and feet would soon end.

He walked through the front door expecting to be greeted by the warmth of the stove but instead was greeted to a room little warmer than the outside and Fanny, bundled in a wool blanket, wining due to the cold.

Mrs. Thornton, sitting at the table, was looking over the monthly expenses as John entered the room, much to her surprise. "John! You are home early"

He walked over to the stove in hopes of warming his frozen hands and feet as he said " Mr. Patterson sent me home early, its starting to sleet and snow and knowing how far I have to walk he wished me not to get caught in the coming storm."

"I was unaware it started to snow" she said not bothering to look up from her present task.

John gave is mother a puzzled look. "How could you not know its snowing? The wind is howling from the north and ice is hitting the windows and its so cold in here. Mother couldn't we...' he paused briskly rubbing his hands together for added warmth, '...couldn't we just add a little more coal..."

Hannah cut him off briskly before he could finish. "No John! You know we have to make our coal supply last till the end of the season."---
"But mother Fanny is..."---
"Not another word John! You know quite well what we have to do and why we can't spare the expense"

He turned away from his mother's stern look of reproof and once again took up the task of rubbing his hands together. Fanny's wining was now turning louder which caused John to clench his teeth in pure irritation. Finally when he could take no more he spun around and snapped "Can't you make her stop that incessant wining at least mother!!" His eyes flashed with anger.

Hannah stopped what she was doing and calmly met her son's glaring eyes with her own stern blue gray eyes. "John she is hungry and cold..." he cut her off "And so am I mother yet I'm not..."

"John!" she said with firm authority that stopped his words mid sentence and in so doing also silenced Fanny's wining. She then continued in a milder tone "John, she is a small child, she doesn't understand. All she knows is that she is cold and hungry, -- we all are, but you and I - we understand why things have to be like this--- for now at least"

John's expression took on a look of contrition "I'm ....forgive me mother, its just......just so hard" the last words were spoken barely above a whisper as he bowed his head and turned away so she wouldn't see his face.

"John" She softly spoke his name while getting up and walking over to where he stood. He wouldn't turn to look at her. She spoke his name again, "John" it was spoken with such gentle tenderness in her voice that John slowly turned to face her, his sorrowful blue eyes meeting hers, and it seemed to her that at that very moment he looked for all the world like a little boy of six on the verge of tears...... It was a look that tore at her heart.
She gently reached out and caressed his cheek giving him a comforting smile, her words full of all the love she felt for her dear son. "I understand how hard this is for you John, so much you've had to sacrifice, and you are working so hard so that we can put right the debts incurred by your father. You are truly a good, noble son John, and I am proud and --your father would be proud as well, of the man you are becoming."

On hearing these words his continence changed, and a tentative shy smile played upon his lips and was evident in his eyes ,then with a note of remorse in his voice he said "I didn't mean to lash out like that, it was just .... I was so cold and Fanny..."

"Its alright John," At this moment she raised her other hand so she could hold John's face in her hands like she use to do when he was a small boy, needing reassurance. "I know we are short on comforts at present and it can cause tempers to flair, --yours perhaps more readily than others..." The last remark was said with a knowing smile, causing John to give a small laugh, sheepishly dropping his gaze, for the remark was indeed true. Hannah continued this time more serious "I promise you John things will get better, that I do promise! Together we will get through this! Now, no more talk on this matter." lowering her hands she took a step back.

"Here now let me go make you a pot of tea to warm you up a bit would you like that?" Nodding his head he said "I would like that very much mother" ..."Good .And I will see what I can do about some supper." At hearing the word supper a boyish grin broke out on John's face, as he said "Need I ask what that will be mother?" Hannah turned to look at John, a bit of mirth shown on her face as she replied "Why John, its your favorite of course" This rejoinder caused both to laugh, for it was a well know truth in the Thornton household that John despised porridge above all else.

Little Fanny during this time sat in her chair trying to be as quite as she could.
John still laughing walked over to where she was sitting and held out his arms to her "Come Fan, come sit with me next to the stove, it's a little warmer there."... Large sapphire blue eyes looked up into his and in an instant he scooped her up, wool blanket and all and swung her into his arms which elicited peels of laughter.
He carried her over to the stove and sat her down on a little stool.
He shrugged out of his wool coat and shivered as the cold hit him anew and kneeling down he placed it around Fanny.
"There, is that better Fan?" She looked up at him with smiling eyes and nodded her head which caused John to tussle her golden ringlets of hair. Then fortified by his mothers words looked at her with all seriousness as he said "I promise you Fanny we won't endure this any longer than we have to. I will get us out of here I promise, I will always take care of you and Mother."....


"John?" He was brought back to the present by his mothers words, his eyes refocusing on her.........Yes, he thought, Fanny was weak, never one to endure hardships, although he always felt a little hardship might do her some good yet he always remembered his boyhood promise.

"Yes I will help mother although Watson is a fool! He made his own bed and ought to lie in it! But for Fanny's sake mother, I'll see what I can do about securing a position for him in the mill, and I'll see what I can do about finding them a suitable house. Watson has incurred a fare amount of debt that will need to be paid off but I think I can find something suitable,yet I am sure it won't be to Fanny's liking." Giving his mother a small knowing smile. .....................

©2010, leah147, All Rights Reserved.