Nineteen
I'm not sure how to feel lately, it's been a couple days since I ran into Yoongi. My heart still aches every single time I thought about him, our little chat was something we both needed. But still I felt empty from it, he finally tells me he loves me only to basically say goodbye to me. It wasn't fair.
I know he's only doing this for my wellbeing, he wants me to be happy and move on but a huge part of me doesn't want to. Especially now that I know how he feels after all these painful years. I know I shouldn't hang on to hope but it was all I had at this point. Hope that somehow things will work out for both of us. I just wish he'd get rid of Leena and we can be together.
The Yoongi from that night was the Yoongi only I got to see, sweet, a bit shy and still a asshole but a more likable asshole at that. I loved when he was that Yoongi, soft and speaks his feelings. I just wish he'd be that Yoongi all the time.
We could be together and be happy if he was that Yoongi, the one I know and love. I know he said he can't be that guy but in my heart I know it's just a front because he's scared. He can be the guy that makes me happy, we was the guy that made me happy...
Until Leena came along...not to mention Jungkook...
Oh Jungkook...
I smile down at the sleeping boy, we had spent more time together lately and I felt a bit guilty about it. But Yoongi was right, I deserved to be happy and as much as I try to fight it...Jungkook makes me happy.
He's one of the only other men in this world that makes my heart flutter the way Yoongi makes it flutter. I sigh and push back his hair, he smiles in his sleep and I smile back. He was so handsome, a tad childish but that's what made things so fun...
If Yoongi was saying goodbye to me and meant every word he spoke that night then maybe I should take his advice...he was happy with Leena so why shouldn't I be happy with Jungkook?
"Good morning princess"
I blush as I catch Jungkook's gaze, his deep raspy morning voice giving me an instant heart attack. "Morning" I mumble smiling down at him, his eyes are still shut as I gently stroke his hair.
I could get used to this, I could get used to being with Jungkook all the time and that was a scary thing. But maybe it was a thing that had to happen, to really push me over the edge and jump off this Yoongi roller coaster ride.
"What are you doing up so early?"
I watch as he yawns and stretches out, he really did have a glorious body. He props himself up a bit before pulling me back into his side, I happily curl into the shirtless bunny. "Just thinking" I mumble against him, his grip tightens just a bit as he kisses the top of my head.
"Hope you're thinking about what I asked you..."
I chuckle a bit and look up at him "I don't recall what you're talking about" he rolls his eyes before leaning down and kissing my face up "You know exactly what I'm talking about woman" he mumbles in between each kiss.
I laugh as I go over my thoughts once more, I deserved to be happy. That's all everyone has been telling me lately...so I should listen right?
I push him off and pin him down to the bed, he smirks as I straddle his waist. His hands instantly rest on my hips as I smile down at him. "How Long would it be again?"
"We would leave next week...and we won't be back for at least a month...do something for you y/n, go with me. I'm not asking you to go as my girlfriend sense we agreed to take things slow...but I do want you to go, I think it'll be a good experience for you"
A month, I'd be gone for a whole month just traveling with Jungkook. No work no business calls nothing just traveling the world for a month with this crazy guy I'd met only a few short months ago. But oddly it felt longer and I felt so comfortable with him...
He raises his brows at me as I contemplate once again, I should go. I should leave this place for a while and just clear my head. Jimin would be so proud of me and Yoongi...well I shouldn't care what he would think but I do. His words constantly replaying in my head.
"Fine I'll go!"
~~~
Filler chapter
Before the final
💜
