Expectations

Part 2

"How long has it been since you two were last intimate?" The question hangs in the air menacingly. You swallow and try to think. "Maybe...A month and a half?" Your therapist sighs and takes off her glasses. "Listen, Y/N. This happens with relationships, okay. Perfectly normal. Maybe you should think about taking a break from it all." You raise an eyebrow. "What do you mean?" Your therapist clears her throat and continues, "Taking a break from trying. I think it would be healthy for you-and your partner, to focus on other things." Other things? The Parks were coming over this weekend. They would grill both you and Jinyoung about your lack of pregnancy......

You sigh defeatedly. "I don't know if I can, my in-laws are coming this weekend and they always..." Your therapist nods sympathetically. "I understand that. However, you MUST distance yourself and your emotions from this pressure. You have to, Y/N." You laugh softly. "Okay and just HOW do I do that?" Your therapist gives you a small smile. "Distract them. Give them other things to think about. In the mean time, work on building non sexual intimacy with your partner." You blink. Non sexual intimacy. She had a point.

Sex wasn't the biggest part of your relationship with Jinyoung. You both loved reading together, cuddled up in bed. You used to do puzzles together, or would binge watch a new TV show on the couch. Sometimes you'd take a road trip to Jinhae and spend a day by the ocean. You missed those days. The carefree days.

You nod in understanding. "Okay, I will definitely try and work on this." Soon your appointment time is up, and you take the elevator back down to the first floor. Your brain is working a mile a minute. What is something Jinyoung would like to do? Visit a museum? Book shopping? Road trip? You step outside into the cold winter air and suddenly get a great idea.

"Honey, I'm home!" Jinyoung calls merrily. You laugh and greet him with a kiss on the cheek. "I'm glad, but I was thinking about heading out." Jinyoung looks at you, confused. "To do what?" You smile at him and hold out a flyer. The Christmas lights were still up around town, and there was a light show somewhere locally. "I thought we could go see the lights and then grab dinner somewhere." Jinyoung chuckles and kisses your forehead. "You're so cute. I like this idea."

The two of you head out, hand in hand. Your heart skips merrily. Sad to say, but this was probably the most Jinyoung had touched you in over a month. It didn't feel forced. It felt natural and fun. Jinyoung seeks out a park bench that has a birds eye view of the light show. "We should be able to see everything from here."

The lights flicker on, and it feels like the world has suddenly been illuminated be an array of colorful lights. You crane your head this way and that, trying to take in all of the dazzling colors. You turn to look at Jinyoung, and smile. He looks so excited, his eyes are shimmering. It was as if a child opened a new toy on Christmas. Jinyoung's happiness was not only tangible, but infectious.

You lean your head on his shoulder, watching the lights twinkle. "This was a great idea, Y/N." He gives you a quick peck on the lips before turning back to the lights. Your heart feels so fully and happy.

Afterwards, the two of you decide to go in a ramen shop. It has a rustic and homey feel. Just the kind of shop Jinyoung likes. "I had no idea this place existed." Jinyoung shakes his head in awe. You beam at him. "I found it on a google search. Supposed to have the best ramen in the city." Jinyoung pinches your cheek. "Well, aren't you thoughtful?"

Your orders come, two heaping bowls of ramen. Jinyoung's came with extra pork, fried onion, and egg. You ordered a vegetarian one. Jinyoung inhales the scent, appreciating the beauty of the dish. "This looks wonderful, baby." You laugh and lightly smack his arm. "I didn't cook the food, I just found the place." Jinyoung makes quick work of his bowl, soon finishing it. "That bad, huh?" You ask teasingly. Jinyoung smirks at you, "Yeah, I don't think I'll come back." He winks at you, and gives your hand a light squeeze.

So far, this whole creating non sexual intimacy seemed to be working. You couldn't rush it though. Plus, it felt fun to not be focusing on a baby for once.

That night, you and Jinyoung cuddled in bed. It wasn't foreplay, nor was it being used to initiate sex. You both just simply laid there, your bodies connected. You can feel Jinyoung's breath tickle your ear as he strokes your head. "Tonight was really fun, Y/N." You nod and squeeze his hand. "I thought so too, Jinyoung." He kisses your cheek and hums. "We should definitely do stuff like this more often." You wholeheartedly agreed.