Disappear

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I lay in bed alone at night and wonder why I'm here.
I do so much for everyone 
Why don't they show they care?
I met this girl who said she loved me 
something I haven't heard in so long.
She used me for my money 
what a ride she took me on.
There is so much hurt I feel, so much anger trapped inside.
Sometimes I wish my dad was here, but to me he's not alive.
I have no one to talk to
These drugs seem to be the only way
Turns out it's a lie just like the smile I put on each and everyday.
I know outside I'm smiling, It's the face I fake for you,
But inside my soul is crying and there is nothing I can do.
I know my family loves me, 
I'm there when their decisions are poor. 
I'm sick of feeling like this walked on rug thrown upon the floor.
I lay in bed and wonder what the hell I'm doing here
Can I wake up from this dream?
Can I please just disappear?

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