SoulFire ( sans x frisk AU)

The Patience it takes for another to become Brave (part 2)

"Fries without the dose of ketchup?"

"Yeah. Lid screwed on tight enough?" 

"I've learned from that mistake at least." He orders her food. 

"I see that." 

Silence lingers between the two of them for a moment, the rest of Grilby's bar is vacant. Sans lifts a red bottle to his lips. "It took you long enough to connect that letter to the note i slipped to you, Kid."

"How long have you been sitting here?" is all she says regarding his impatient statement. 

"Long enough to know that the doctor doesn't wake up early enough to beat Papyrus to work anymore," he says. "You found the last one?" 

"Why else am I here?" 

"Just checkin'." 

The food hasn't even been prepped and they fall into another loop of knowing silence. They both knew what the other wanted to say, but neither of them spoke up. Frisk stared at the wooden counter, daring herself to say something. What could start the conversation? This was going to be their goodbye. She wanted it to be snappy but she also wanted it to count.  

"I read the letter." 

"And?..." 

"...I cant tell you wether or not it was worth it."  

"What part?" he looks down at her from his seat. 

"Wether or not lying to everyone was worth what I've been given... I can't tell you if I rightfully gained anything I have now..." She leans against the bar, her eyes resting on the liquor cabinet ahead of her. "I've thought about what might happen when I break the barrier. I have made a lot of predictions, but no matter how different they have all been, they all had one thing in common; In each one, I was content. But now, I don't know if I will be. Not after everything that we went through." 

"We?" 

"... Everything I  went through." 

"Ah..." 

"Why did you want me here? What closure did you think we'd find?" Frisk tilted her head up to look him in the socket, her eyes glistening like a jewel. She never imagined saying goodbye directly. . .

There is a bit of a pause between Sans's inhale and his response, but when it comes out, it's confident and true. "I feel like, if there isn't a way to stop you, then I might as well try to understand you, just one last time. And maybe, you'll be more ease too when I am through with what i've got to say."   

"Understand me?" She chuffs "Understand WHAT about me?"

"If you fell the first time because you wanted to die, and then jumped a second time because you wanted to die too, how come you didn't just kill yourself on the surface?" 

"Wow, this is a conversation I would rather not be having." 

"Im serious, Frisk. You fell when you were five, trying to kill yourself even then, yeah? Well after that experience, you would have known that falling again wouldn't do shit for you. If a five year old body can survive the fall into the flowers, then a seventeen year old can too. It's common sense. The only other reason you gave us was because you wanted to find those lost kids. I have debunked that statement from being true just by looking back on your tendencies. You never asked about the kids, or were their bodies were. You didn't seem the least bit curious, ever. So I want to know the reason why you took that jump." 

Frisk thought for a minute. . . Why did she jump?.... What was going through her mind? 

She hated herself, and wanted to get hurt, to make someone worry about her the first time... She did know that jumping wasn't going to kill her... Did she want attention again? Like those years before?... Or had she said those things to perhaps fool herself...? 

At first, she maybe felt crazy. No one on the surface believed her when she mentioned monsters underground. But it wasn't why she jumped. Proving they existed was a plus to that reason. 

After reading that little slip of paper over and over to herself in her memories, Frisk slowly began to understand. The reason why she jumped again.. It was for this very moment.... 

It was so she could properly tell Sans about the impact he had on her... The way he made her want a better future... The resolve... 

"I came to your call.... because you never let me tell you goodbye, Mr. Skeleton." 

"So you only came because you wanted to leave again?" 

"No, i didn't come back just to leave the way you did..." She shakes her head. "I jumped because I had know something, something you still haven't said to me yet, and probably never will." 

Grilby slides an order of fries over to Frisk, standing there just long enough to catch her words clearly.

"I jumped because I wanted to hear you tell me you loved me, Sans." She spoke quieter, "Even after all this time, You still haven't said it... But I know for a fact that I still do love you, no matter how little I really know you. The only thing I need to figure out before I go, is wether or not I love you or just the idea of loving someone." 

Sans sets down the red bottle, unable to look at her. "I love you." 

"Do you?" 

"Yeah, I do."  

Frisk scoops up a few fries. "How much...?" 

"...Enough to marry you." 

Grillby stood there in amusement, the yellow glow of his eyes brighter and his arms crossed over one another. He was expecting them to kiss each other at any moment, or for Sans to propose to her. The human princess marries her knight in shinning armor skeleton, and they live happily ever after in the end. 

To his dismay, none of those things were real enough to happen. 

Frisk pushed her plate of fries away from her and dried one of her eyes. "Thank you..." 

"Your welcome... Now what?" Sans turned to her, placing his hand over hers only for him to be shaken away. "..." 

"Now, you have to wait until our next life." She mutters, pushing herself up and blinking away tears, a small smile on her face. "Goodbye, Sans the skeleton." 

Frisk walks out of the bar without him behind her,  and without looking back to see his expression. She didn't have to see him in order to know that he was watching her leave. Just as she makes it out the door, Frisk can hear him repeat himself for her. "I love you." 

But she didn't have the voice to say it back.