10. • slipping

276 4 0
                                    

• TRIGGER WARNING •
- 4 months later-
Asher and i haven't been doing well since Hazel didn't come home. We argue a lot. Harper loves her sister but constantly asked where Hazel went. We made a video about a week after i got out discussing how we might not be making videos for a while.
I woke up this morning and normally Asher is there, but he wasn't. I texted him " Where are you?"
He didn't answer. I saw harper loving on her baby sister. The room was to small for 2 people but it's what we have to deal with. I felt like i was slipping from life at this point. I dropped Harper off at daycare and called Asher. Voicemail. I buckled in the 4 month old and we went with my mom to go eat. ••••••••••• skip a little••••••••••
Am: where as-
A: he left in the middle of the night, he hasn't come back
Am: Have you called him
A: no answer
Am: Annie, what's going on with you two
A: I have no idea
Am: Annie you a strong girl, stronger then i could ever be or ever was, and i know when life is being sucked out of you and he is at this point sucking the life out of you hunny
A: im not breaking up with him, i love him
Am: y'all need a break
A: No. I won't give up. Not like you and dad did, i will never do that to my kids not the way you did that to me
Am: I'm not a horrible person Julianna
A: Ok i'm gonna go i need to go to Target
Am: A- ok
i got into the car. No i'm not giving up on us.
i went to target and picked up Harper. I made her dinner. Mac and Cheese With Chicken Nuggets shaped like dinosaurs. It was movie night but Asher wasn't here so i let her sit on the couch and watch whatever she wanted. I fed Hope and it was time for me to put her to sleep. She is a really nice and calm baby, which is amazing. I gave harper a bath, she put on her pjs

 I gave harper a bath, she put on her pjs

Oops! This image does not follow our content guidelines. To continue publishing, please remove it or upload a different image.

and i braided her hair.
H: Mama where's daddy
A: i don't know baby but let's go time to sleep
She laid in her bed and i tucked her in, i gave her a kiss and let her sleep. I took a shower and changed

i got bored started doing the dishes

Oops! This image does not follow our content guidelines. To continue publishing, please remove it or upload a different image.

i got bored started doing the dishes. The door opened and Asher came though.
A: so you didn't get up and leave
As: what the hell is that supposed to mean
A: What is that supposed to mean?! it means that all day i thought you got up and left. I thought you left me here and wouldn't say a word and you were leaving the country. Or maybe you were screwing some hooker and you were drunk as hell. Asher i thought you were done
As: ANNIE I AM DONE ! IM DONE
i stood there frozen, he has never yelled at me like that.
A: YOUR DONE. YOUR GONNA LEAVE YOU DAUGHTERS?! WOW FATHER OF THE YEAR AWARD
As: IM NOT DONE WITH THEM IM DONE WITH YOU! I WILL SEE MY KIDS BUT I CANT LIVE LIKE THIS ANYMORE
A: What..
As: Annie were through i'm leaving.
A: No You can't just leave. You love me
he didn't answer he was packing a bag
A: You can't just leave me here, Alone
As: watch me
He stormed out of the apartment. My heart felt like it was a broken vase. I fell on the floor crying. I grabbed a knife and slit my wrists. I haven't done that since i was 12.. i realized what i did and dropped the knife. i knew how to stop them from bleeding.
I did and laid down and cried myself to sleep

𝙶𝚒𝚛𝚕𝚏𝚛𝚒𝚎𝚗𝚍Where stories live. Discover now