Chapter 1: Up or Down?

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         I can't take this anymore. I feel like I've been unemployed for years. It's tough being an actress. I shouldn't even call myself that anymore. Maybe my mother was right; maybe I should have gone through law school. I bet I would have enough money to live without a roommate if I were a lawyer.

-Everything alright there? -My roommate asks from the living room.

-Yeah, I guess. -I say feeling a bit tipsy from snapping out of my thoughts too quickly. I look around and realize that I'm standing in the kitchen with a single beer bottle in front of me on the counter. As it turns out, I have come into the kitchen to grab a beer, but I had a 3-minute existential crisis instead.

-How long does it take for you to open one of these? -My roommate jokes as she enters the kitchen to check on me.

-Shut up. -I say playfully. Even though I would love to live on my own, I can't really complain about Emily; she's a great roommate and friend.

-Thinking about career stuff, huh? -She asks, sitting down in front of me on the stool by the kitchen counter.

-How did you know, psychic witch? -I mock, sitting by her side.

-Well, I just know that you're one of those bores that actually cares about that shit.

-Don't you? I swear to God, you always seem so calm about money. Where do you even get it from?

-I told you this a million times; I'm a hooker. -She jokes with an annoyed voice.

-Then I'm just gonna have to become a pimp. -I chuckle.

-Why not a whore? Would your boyfriend be jealous or something? -She teases me.

-Why are you always picking on him?

-First of all: I don't like him. -She says and I scoff. -Second of all: I don't think you like him either.

-What? Of course I like him, he's my boyfriend.

-Really? From where I'm standing, he acts like he owns you and you tolerate him, at best.

-From where I'm standing, we're in a good relationship. -I get up and walk over to the spot I was standing at before she walked in. -And my point of view on this matters much more than yours.

-Good relationship is way too much. You can pass as friends, but boyfriend and girlfriend? I don't buy it.

-Why not? -I ask while finally opening my beer.

-Because, as great as you two might be together, there's no spark. There's no chemistry.

-That's not true. -I say sitting down by her again.

-Of course it is, I bet you don't even know if there's chemistry.

-How am I supposed to know?

-When it's there, you know it. Believe me, once it happens to you, you'll be sure. So, if you're not sure, it ain't there.

-Whatever you say, I still think he's a great guy.

-And I still don't.

We toast playfully and I take a big sip of beer as I try not to seem worried about my boyfriend. What if Emily is right? What if not being sure of whether chemistry is there or not means that it's not? I am definitely not sure, so I better pray that she's wrong. Suddenly, my phone starts buzzing on the counter.

-Oh, maybe that's him! -She pretends to be excited as I grab the phone and read the screen.

-It's my agent. -I give Emily a serious look and she continues to mock me. I get up and start walking around the kitchen as I pick up. -Hey Chris...

-How's my best client doing? I'm so glad you picked up. -Christine says cheerfully over the phone.

-Is something wrong? -I ask knowing that it's pretty rare of her to be so happy and to call with good news.

-Absolutely not. I just got you an audition for an incredible movie!

-Last time I believed that, I ended up at an audition for what I can only assume to be incestuous themed porn. -I say and hear a chuckle from Emily.

-This time I'm serious! Check your messages, I just sent you the script and the audition address.

I follow her instructions and read the title of the movie on the script.

-Are you kidding me? This movie is based on the best novel on earth! There are already Oscar rumors about this! -I say in disbelief.

-I told you; this one is a great one.

My excitement and happiness are immediately shut down as I read the details about the audition.

-The audition is in twenty minutes and it's all the way downtown! I didn't even have the time to memorize the script!

-I'm sure you'll make it. -She says unbothered. -Good luck, darling.

-Chris, can't you just... -I stop talking as I realize that she already hung up. -Shit! -I shout to Emily.

-Hey, you just got some great news, why are you so stressed?

-I'm late, extremely late! I haven't had a job in a long time and I haven't had a chance like this ever. -I say nervously as I put on my coat. -I can't fuck this up.

-Just go for it, you'll be fine.

-I hope so. Bye, Em. -I say opening the door.

-Bye, and good luck! -She says with a friendly voice as I walk out.

I run down a couple of staircases and finally leave the apartment complex. It takes me a couple of minutes to get a cab, but I finally do. I tell him the address and memorize the script as he drives. The part I'm auditioning for seems to be really small, but it's still a huge deal. We get there earlier than expected; I'm right on time. I go inside the white building where I'm supposed to audition. It's pretty big and fancy, so I try to calm myself down before entering. I enter awkwardly and go up to the doorman.

-Excuse me, sir. -I say shyly.

-How may I help you? -He asks with a tired voice, looking up from his phone.

-I'm having an audition here...

-Auditions are on the eighteenth floor, third door to the left. -He interrupts me without being too rude.

-Thank you. -I smile and he nods back.

I immediately run to the elevator and the doors open slowly. To my surprise, the elevator isn't empty. As I see the woman that's behind those doors, my whole body freezes; she's Sarah Paulson. I stand in front of the elevator for a solid 5 seconds, making sure that I'm not crazy and that it really is her in the there. She looks up from her phone and our eyes meet for the first time. God, she's beautiful.

-Up or down? -She asks.

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