Alone

Sessions

2 months later
I guess since you try to kill yourself, which wasn't my plan. It just all became to much and I wanted it to stop. People try to pretend that they care about you, that they see you. When in reality they only pretend to see you. So they don't feel bad about themselves and their actions that took part of it.
It's been two months since my escape and ever since then my parents have been making me see a therapist, unknown to the outside world because it would mess up their image. Part of me thought that all this would change something, but it hasn't. My dad still leaves every other week and mom just stays late at the office every night. Emmett barely lives at home anymore. So it's just me and Emily, when she's not at her friends house. Alone. Everyday, but most of the time I don't mind. Except when I have nightmares, those times I just want someone to hold me and tell me it's going to be alright. But then they'd know, without me even having to tell them. They could sense it as my body would flinch with their touch.

I walk into Dr. Wilsons' office. So far we have not gotten anywhere. However, I feel like she is okay with that, the lack of progress.

"Hello Emma, how are you doing today?"

" I'm okay." I say in an almost whisper.

"So what has been up lately? Last week we were talking about how your grades were improving. You're mom says your after school tutoring has really been affective."

Affective, I laugh a little to myself. The only reason my grades are better is because the better I do on my assignments, the less tutoring I have to go to. Leaving me far away from Mr. O. Our "relationship" has advanced. He often wants to see me on my free period as well as after school. On those days I want to crawl up into a little ball and turn inside of myself.

********
" Hey Em, I missed you." Mr.O says as he quickly locked his classroom door. He doesn't hesitate to get close to me.

"I don't know how much longer I can go on like this. It hard missing the women you love, I only get to see you on occasion. It is really killing me. I was up all night thinking about us, and our relationship. So this morning I went to the store and go you something! Close your eyes!"

I hesitate, I don't want anything that he has to offer. He reaches out towards me, our hands intertwine.

"Em, I love you. So close your eyes." He almost scowls.
I slowly close my eyes. His excitement made me scared, what could he have gotten me? He runs over to his desk and pulls out a small black box.

" Okay, open!" He bells out.

The grin on his face shows it all, his feelings, pure and utter joy. How can he? How can he think this is okay. I flinch at his touch, I do everything possible to get out of our little "tutoring" sessions. I have come to the realization that there is something seriously wrong with this man, and for some reason it frightens me.

"Go on, open it."

I can feel myself become hot. What if it's a ring. What if he wants us to make a commitment to each other. My hand tremble as I open up the box. It almost feels heavy in my hands. I slowly lift up the lid. I let out a sigh of relief as I realize it is just a necklace. It stood shining in the light with a small little heart attached He quickly snatches the box from my hands. He pulls the necklace out and undoes the clasp. His hands touch my neck, tenderly as he stands behind me. I feel his whole body around me, standing over me. Making me feel small. He brings the necklace around my neck and puts the clasps together. He runs my neck slowly, and takes a deep breath in, taking in my scent. I can feel his hands start to roam my body, softly at first but then more aggressively. Without and notice or hesitation he bends my body over his desk. I can feel the cold wood touch my skin. He begins to fumble with his belt buckle, eagerly. I freeze, just like I always do. But my mind can not drift away, as I often do during times like this. He has never been like this before, so aggressive, almost violent. My sweatpants are torn off and I feel myself start to cry.

"Emma? Are you okay?" Dr. Wilson asks me.

" Yes, I'm fine. I'm just a little tired. Can we please cut this session short for today?"

"Of course, same time next week?"

I don't say anything, just nod and proceed to the door.

" Oh Emma, that's a beautiful necklace you have."

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I haven't updated this book in years. My life is so different now. I don't even think I write the same anymore. However, I wanted to continue this book. I think this chapter is mediocre but aye.