How to Kill a Man in Thirty Seconds

Chapter 80: A Final Goodbye

As the weeks dragged cruelly by and summer gave in to autumn, the hopelessness that consumed me did not diminish. I was granted custody over Lily, and I preoccupied my days and nights tending to her to keep my mind off the dismal train wreck that had become my life.

While Adrian and I did talk, nothing had been the same since that day. While he desperately struggled otherwise, there was a tension that lingered in the air. A sadness and disappointment that ate away at me.

When he had been hospitalized following the incident, I had sat beside his bed for three long days. My heart had been in my throat as the doctors ran an array of scans and tests. Nevertheless, I hadn't held his hand while he was unconscious, had only embraced him when he had awoken.

He's your cousin. A cold voice in my head had cried heartlessly. You kissed your cousin and then you fucked your cousin.

Adrian had sat by me through every trial, held me each time I had broken down afterwards. Whispered consoling words to me even as I trembled and sobbed. He'd cooked for me on days I had lacked the will to leave my room, nagging relentlessly until I unlocked my door to let him in. He'd rushed over on nights I was haunted by nightmares and remained curled beside me till I finally slipped back into sleep.

Adrian pretended he didn't notice the sudden shift in our relationship; he feigned blindness to the same impending doom we both saw coming. Instead, he dragged our time, didn't ask questions and did what was necessary.

So one bleak autumn day, when I sank to the floor beside him on our usual deck that overlooked the lake, his only response was a soft smile that flitted across his face. It was a warm day, the sky a peachy blue decorated by soft clouds of fluffy white. A gentle breeze was blowing, soothing and peaceful. We could hear the distance chirping of birds, merry and calming, the sounds drifting over the endless black waters of the lake. The trees lining the shoreline swayed, their branches rustling against each other as if whispering secretively in unison.

My gaze flickered over to Adrian, and for a moment, it was all I could do to gaze silently at him, reminiscing in all the memories that had led up to this moment. His legs were pulled up against his chest, and he was staring at the distant horizon, emerald gaze sweeping over the breathtaking hills and infinite waters before him. His wavy hair was rumpled and frayed by the relentless breeze; it lay in a ruffle atop his head, tendrils slipping over his forehead and obscuring his eyes in a sight I had grown to be familiar with. A ghost of a smile danced over his lips; he no longer appeared distressed by the lake or its bottomless depths.

He looked at peace.

In that moment as I gazed at him in silence, I committed him to memory.

A picture frozen forever in time.

"Adrian," my voice was soft, tentative when it sounded and his warm gaze flickered to me, bursting with contentment. "My sister and I are moving to Florida next week," I announced softly.

Adrian's eyes dimmed in an instant. A moment passed while confusion, shock and fear darted through the forest green orbs.

He nodded suddenly, "Alright, I wouldn't mind moving to Florida."

The desperation and sadness that had rushed to haunt his eyes in that split second told me the words were more a plea than anything besides. My heart sank in my chest. I swallowed harshly against the ball of emotion that gathered in my throat, before I forced the words out, "We're going alone, Adrian."

An agonizing moment passed.

Adrian struggled to mask it but I didn't miss the pain that flashed in his eyes, nor the hurt and fear that burned there. He swallowed painfully, and his head nodded vigorously in approval even as moisture rushed into his eyes.