Footprints

six

It's so frustrating, trying to wrap your mind around the actual meaning of life. I'm not being cheesy or whatever, I just don't know what to think at times. I only understand like 9% of life anyways. People say to "live in the moment." I try to, but sometimes it doesn't even seem like there are any moments. Eveything is constantly moving, speeding into the future. There's not any time to stop and live. How does that work? Life should be like a remote. You should be able to pause at the good times and skip forwad through the hard ones. It obviously isn't like that. It'd be too easy.

School, well...school is school. A living hell, but sometimes like a second family. I feel like I don't belong at times; I stand outside groups without actually meaning to, letting others step forward before me. It's a habit, I guess. Other times it's different. I'm happy, laughing, included, and enjoying myself. People need those moments to make it through the week. At least I do.

This week I had English Book Club in school for my elective. The class is for German students to improve their English, but for me, it's an excuse to be reading all day. It's my easiest class now because everything is in English. We all got to choose a book to read induvidually or in pairs. I chose to read a book alone because I didn't want to read in a pair. I saw one of my favorite books, anyway, and it would be too hard for people with English as their second language to comprehend. When the teacher told us to look at her collection of books on the table, I spotted the one. I practically ran over Lea, who was in front of me, when I rushed over to get it.

Looking for Alaska by John Green. Need I say more? I think not. Now, you have to keep this just between us: I've already read this book once. There was no rule against reading a book that you've read before, but I acted like it was new for me. Sue me, but this was John Green; basically the best author of all time. Lea disagrees, but I won't let her to dislike John Green until she has read Paper Towns, my favorite book by him, all the way through. I don't even know how someone could dislike his writing. His quotings are just so good! But yeah, more on that later.