harry styles | my health teacher

41. m i s s i n g y o u

waking up next to harry was strange to say the least. the nostalgia got to the both of us. i could tell by the faint smile plastered over harry's face before he opened his eyes.

after that it's was awkward as fuck and we kind of didn't talk about it. he basically was in shock, probably because he doesn't remember what happened last night due to being shit faced.

the only thing i thought of from when he left a few hours ago is how i miss it. i miss it so fucking much. i haven't stopped loving him and it hurts so much.

as i get ready, a wave of sadness comes over me because i realize that tonight will be the last night i see harry, possibly ever. he is continuing his tour and i'll be here. ill be taking random gigs up until ross and rocky go on their next tour which is hopefully soon.

i've been talking to soph a lot and she says that they are hyped for next tour. there new album comes out next month so tour should be 4-6 months following. i haven't agreed to doing anything yet, but they told me they would love for me to come on tour with them again so i have high hopes about joining them for a round 2.

back to harry, i know that these past 3 days have been nice, just seeing him and being with him, but next week is going to be hell. and the week after. and until the day i die because harry was endgame for me. but he after tonight he is gone from my life for good, so i have to say sayonara to that dream.

—

when i get to the venue, everting goes smoothly, like usual. i've been in a bummed out mood and i can tell helene notices because she keeps asking if i'm ok.

i have a hard time grasping the fact that someone could be here with me then be gone. the only thing that will still be there is the place we were. the place holds the memories and the nostalgia.

i know i'll probably be back to this venue at some point in my career and all i'll feel is sadness.

i'll stand here, in the team room, looking out at the knew band practicing for their show, not harry's. i'll be taking photos of the singer on stage, not harry. i'll be going home right after to lay in the bed that harry once slept in with me.

just thinking about it triggers me.

"peyton??" i hear helene calling, "shows about to start, u good?"

"yeah-yeah. sorry i'm coming." i rely with a sad smile.

—

the night was depressing to say the least. (i know y'all aren't surprised). i begin packing my things and getting ready to leave.

"hey peyton can we talk for a sec?" i hear a familiar accent say from behind me. i look up and meet my eyes with his green ones.

"sure." i say casually. i try not to sound sad because so don't want to show weakness in front of harry. i don't want his pity.

i grab my camera back and laptop and follow him out of the team room. we head toward his dressing room, and when we enter, he lead me to the couch and we take a seat.

"i miss you." he says which catches me off guard.

"wh-what?" i ask making sure i heard him right.

"i said i miss you." he reply's with a sad smile.

"harry, you don't get to say that. you can't fucking say that. do you even know how hard this is for me? your leaving. whatever feelings you have is just the nostalgia from when we were together. past tense harry." i conclude with a sigh.

"no peyton. it wasn't nostalgia, it was a wake up call. i have missed you ever since i left you and i try to convince myself other wise. i distract myself, i try to hide the fact that your the one i love." his words stun me, "i'm not trying to make this hard for you i just wanted to tell you that because if i don't then i know i'll regret it."

"ok, but why are you telling me this? there's nothing we can do about it so it doesn't fucking matter what we miss or what we l-love." i stutter.

"peyton," hey says letting out a sigh then straightens his posture, "i want you to finish the tour with me."

hi guys. thank you if you have read this far! i cant believe we hit 3k views. it's actually crazy, but anyways, thank you for voting as well <3