1/24/20 edit: this was me just slapping my thoughts onto a page while I was high and sad so if you can ignore this that would be great :)most of it was just me commentating on a podcast.(link above)
I've decided to start dating these because why not.
I'm in my room. it's about 1 am and I am really sad. I don't know why I am but I am. I'm listening to the Edge of Sleep (podcast). Everything is different now. I have a boyfriend. I only have 1 actual friend I still trust. My parents are starting to argue more and my dad keeps getting angrier. one minute he's fine then the next he's screaming and throwing things everywhere. My grades are getting better and my emotional state has improved so, so much since last year. i . . . don't like it. I miss everyone. I love Andy and my mom but I need to find someone else to talk to. things have gotten so much better but so much worse in other ways. this is a really weird podcast. it's really fucked up. I think that's the reason for my mood but I can't stop listening. its . . .weirdly intriguing and fucked up. Markiplier does a really good job in this podcast. Katie is gonna fucking die probably lol. the stars on my ceiling are really pretty when mixed with my lights. im finnaly getting a new tv. its like 2x bigger than the one i have now. i measured it the long way and its 38 inches. the one i have now is about 18 i think. ooo dave is mega fucked. what happened. OOOH SHIT ITS THE VAN MAN! HES TIED TO A FUXKING CHAIR AJKSGGDHASJKDFGJHADS....... . . ...lots of screaming and i think Lauren died? i think Katie is also dead. oh shittttttttt. hes gonna fucking get cut open ooooooooof man. OH FUCK NO. AAAAAAJSDBKFHLAKDHG. MARK SCREAMING IS NOT A NICE THING!?!?!?TO MUCH SCREAMING AHHHAHAHHHHHH NOOOOOOOOOOO. ok its no more screaming now. that made me heart go mega fast. give me the big scares. oo i got (applied) for a jiob today. the cosmic pizza place on the crossroad thingsie. fucking plexieglass indeed my dude.