The Unplanned Revenge

i.ii. stuck in the past

Monday, May 25

Being a kid is tough. Going around places with people you don't like and always having the urge to punch everyone in the face is quite a difficult task.

So today I basically winged all my classes so far. I usually try a little bit, but today I was just on "fuck-it" mode.

But then again when am I not?

Currently, I was in my shitty History class half-listening to my raisin teacher.

She is the raisin teacher because she is so old her skin looks like a raisin. It's so loose and wrinkly, that I could probably jump rope with it.

She is so old, I bet she farts dust.

She is so old, I bet her memory is in black and white.

She is so old, she was a waiter at the Last Supper.

mentally high-fives self for staying up till four in the morning reading yo mama jokes

While trying to recall another joke, the bell rang signaling that it was time for lunch. I hopped out of my seat FAST and skipped out the room.

I could just feel the "am i high or did i just see that bitch skip out the classroom" looks.

For me to skip out the classroom, something must have happened for me to be real quirky today.

Today was a special day for me. Very special.

Today was the day I was finally going to get back at Gabrielle and prank her.

First, I walked to my usual spot in the cafeteria (the very back) and got to work.

I pulled out the sandwich I made for lunch today and pulled the contents apart. I threw the contents all around the cafeteria. I then threw macaroni on the wall behind me, pretending someone threw it.

I gathered all my voice to say two words that made one of my wishes come true.

"FOOD FIGHT" I yelled out at the top of my lungs and throwing chunks of food in my hands across the room.

Then in a split second, foods of different kinds were flying around the room.

I see a lasagna. A fish. Some fried chicken.

Wait, are those crab legs?

Throughout all the food flying through the air I was able to spot Miss Perfect Gabrielle and her little bitches on leashes.

mental high five for that one.

I stuck my favorite pack of Hubba Bubba in my mouth, ready for shit to really go down.

This was for my Aeropostale shirt. Rest In Peace.

moment of silence. 🙌

I went a sat a distance from Gabrielle and shot my wad of gum in the dead center of her beach blonde waves.

It sat there for a few going unnoticed, it wasn't until the dumb one of her posse said, "Gabrielle, I like your new hair accessory. Where'd you get it?"

Gabrielle looked at her like as if Miley Cyrus was twerking on her friend's head.

"What accessory?" She said to her friend slowly and get her voice rising higher, which cause the food buffet to stop.

"The one in the middle of your hair, silly!" Her friend giggles and playfully smacks her shoulder. "Where'd you get it?"

Finally Gabrielle touches the center of her head and feels the wad of gum in her hair.

She yelled at the top of her lungs at her new discovery. If I wasn't enjoying this so much I would have slapped her for causing the rioting in my ears.

The cafeteria was dead silent while Gabrielle started to cry.

Well, almost quiet.

I was on the floor crying cause of laughter. This had to be on like a Comedy Central special or something because this was funny as hell.

Garbage star-

Oh, sorry for my error.

*Gabrielle started to shoot daggers at me with her bat poop coated eyes. When she started to gather up her dogs and march over to me, the bell rang.

I cursed at the bell because I really wanted to compliment her on her new hair choice.

I smiled at her and went to my next class which was my favorite.

Gym.

The only reason I liked that class was because I got to throw dodgeballs at people.

p.s. don't tell anyone but i purposely hit people in the face with the dodgeballs.

Fun fact: If you haven't guess already, people are number one on my "CAN ALL DISAPPEAR AND WOULD NOT GIVE A SHIT" list.
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Going home that day, I guess you could say I felt like a boss ass bitch.

Like I have a massive gold chain and stacks of cash thrown around me.

I saw my mom and dad in the kitchen, once again doing old people stuff.

My mother came and handed me my snacks and gave me a half-heartedly hug.

"Welcome home sweetie! How was your day?" my mother piped up and asked me.

"Aye yo wassup moms. Wassup pops. Ain't did a thang, just chillin." I said to them while fist bumping them. "Well I will be in my crib if you need me."

I then left them with that "am i high or did that bitch just say 'crib'" look.

That's when I went into my room and started plotting my prank for my next victim.

~~
honestly don't know what these two chapters were but we got one down and some more to go.

~ d-swiggle

{almost 20 reads, dunno why but um hi..?}