THE STORMS WITHIN

Quite a blindsided gesture...

Fate offers a balance of fortunes and misfortunes. Good days and bad days. It is also said that the good days may not be appreciated as much if the bad days did not come.  Then there are days when the bad ones never felt worse. But Fate also has an uncanny way of unveiling the truth about those bad days, and in a way that no one saw coming. It may also end up exonerating the person that was hurt the most...

Enjoying family time was a time of day that Can and Sanem Divit loved the most. Work may wait. Final editing of her book may wait. Other matters may wait. Because what mattered the most was that they were together. They survived through the darkest days of their lives. They made it through. And they grew stronger because of it. They may have broken each other's hearts and souls into pieces, but they mended them together. No one would ever know or be able to match the unity of what bound them to one another. They were one now - one heart, one soul, and one feisty heck of a spirit.

Where Sanem helped Can to look at things with greater compassion, his support allowed her to be more bold, more confident, and it allowed her to dream more and to reach new heights. Heights she never even considered herself. It was his idea for them to write those children's books they had spoken of so many times. Their first children's book draft was already completed. Can promised to Sanem that going forward he would work only with her as a collaborator. He would only be her partner in her future projects. And that he would not allow his camera's lense to take a single shot for a book that wasn't hers. Likewise, their children's books would consist of not only his photographs, but his drawings as well. They had come up with the idea that their children's books would tell a story of a valiant father bird showing his three brave little birds all the wonders that the world and life had to offer, and they would always return home for the evening supper prepared by their loving mother bird. They planned to title the books "The Albatross Family Adventures". The books were planned to be a trilogy, a three part story, meant as a gift for each of their children. And the theme of each of the books was influenced by their children's names: Sea, Star, and Fire...

As Sanem was busy editing the last pages of her second novel sitting by the dining room table, she took little glimpses at Can, who sat just outside on the patio with their children. Sitting in the warmth of the early evening sun, Can was lost in the tale of the brave baba bird, flying high with his three little birds around the world, exploring, seeking new horizons, looking for unseen treasures only brave birds were destined to find. She smiled whenever he spread his arms, wide and proud as he had a habit of. She loved that gesture. He was a true Albatross then. Her Albatross. No longer trapped, but confident enough in their love that he could spread his wings and always return to his save haven. She had to admit these kind of evenings were her favorite.

The editing of the book forced her to read over and recall moments that cut her heart more than she cared to admit. The days she spent by his hospital bed, begging Fate and the Amber Princess to bring him back to her, then begging them again to bring his memory back after he regained consciousness. Those memories still felt heavy on her heart. When Can left, her heart turned to stone, much like in her story of the Bride Rock. To a dreamer, a frozen heart felt like abandoning life. She felt alone, all alone. She felt betrayed. She felt abandoned by the one man who asked her to forsake all others and marry her. She still remembered the deafening sound of each step he took while walking away from her in that hospital hallway after he pushed Yigit. Photographic memory or not, her heart would never forget that sound. Because that was the sound of her life ending... It was the sound of her beloved giving up on her... It was the sound of Can Divit choosing to spend the rest of his life without her...

She paid the greatest price for failing to reach for his hand when it was the only thing he asked of her. She remembered his question, and it played itself over and over and over in her nightmares every night since he left until the day he returned. His words laid heavy on her conscience because she knew he was right... "Would You really believe I could have burned that notebook and hurt You?" Though her mind wanted to believe the facts presented to her by Yigit, her heart screamed within her to trust Can. To believe Can. To believe the only person who knew her heart the way Can did. But she got scared.