Euphoria

2| The aftermath

The sun shown down into the room giving the most beautiful golden colour effect. My head was spinning. I felt like death. I hadn't gotten that drunk in so long. Last night was mostly a blur. I mean. I remember some of it. But- oh fuck. Why was Lincoln beside me. My heart began to race a million miles a minute. Please don't be naked. I prayed as I lifted the blankets. SHIT! What did I do. I jumped up and grabbed my clothes off the floor racing to the bathroom. I slammed the door shut, locking it. Cursing myself for being so loud. Literally hyperventilating. I had sex with my brothers best friend?! Or his old best friend..... Better.... But still! No! Ugh! How did this even happen. There were so many questions going through my head. I was in utter panic. I could barely think with all the blood rushing through my head.

I jumped when I heard a knock at the door. I stood there frozen... naked and frozen clutching my clothes to my chest. "Octavia?" He spoke so calmly.
I still didn't answer.
"I know you're in there— Can we talk?" Lincoln's voice was so reassuring and mesmerizing It frustrates me.
"I... I'm just—going pee." I stammered out shutting my eyes in embarrassment. I felt my cheeks grow hot. I quickly threw on my underwear and bra, struggling to dress myself as fast as I possibly could. I took a breath before opening the door and peaking out.
"Hi" Is the only thing I could think to say to the man standing before me, my eyes trailed down his bare, dark skinned, tattoo covered torso, practically drooling at his abs but my eyes snapped up at the waist band of his sweats.
"Hi." He answered back in the same time as me, the half crooked smile on his face making me melt inside. Why did he have to be so attractive.
"Look- Im sorry about last night... I never meant for this to happen." He stated and my heart sunk just a little, though I had Not idea why. He was right. This was a mistake, it wasn't suppose to happen.
"Yeah me too. It's all good." I nodded desperately trying to swallow back the sob stuck in my throat. This was already embarrassing as it was. As I stood there, bits and pieces came back to me.
"Soooo friends?" He held out his hand for me to shake as a peace treaty.
I forced myself to smile and nod before sucking out my hand, shaking his. "Friends." I mumbled out and then pulled my hand away, stroking my hair back with a finger.
I looked back as I heard someone running down the hall. "I guess I should probably—" He pointed to the door.
"Yeah.." I nodded and then he nodded and made his way to the door awkwardly.
After he left, I buried my hands in my face and let out a long growl. Why was I so stupid.
I walked back into the bathroom and shut the door, taking off all my clothes once again and throwing them into my suitcase, the half wear I'd put all my dirty clothes. I hoped into the shower and did my thing, pondering in thought too. Why was this bugging me so much. People had one night stands all the time and it was fine. But I had this gut feeling. I felt— guilty, upset... upset with myself for feeling sad. I never knew I had feelings for this guy, ya sure he was hot. But it went deeper than that. I want him to see me as a person and not just another girl he's slept with, but clearly that's all I was to him.
After torturing myself with thoughts in the shower, I managed to pull myself together, changing into some fresh clothes, some jean shorts and a tank top. I threw my hair in a messy bun with thankfully didn't look horrific. I left the bathroom and the room, skipping down the stairs towards the kitchen to look for something to eat.
As I rounded the corner, I saw everybody already in the kitchen filling their plates. The boys had made pancakes for breakfast so finding something wasn't necessary. I greeted everyone good morning, eyes scanning the room. I stole a quick glance at Lincoln, he was already sitting with Monty eating. I frowned a little bit was quick to grab a plate. I filled it with fruit and pancakes, walking over to the table with Bellamy. I took a seat beside him and began to eat silently. The boys were loud and full on conversation and normally I wouldn't listened in maybe even added a few things but my mind was still too busy burdening itself with what had happened last night.

After breakfast, I did everyone's dishes and cleaned up the table. Mostly to distract myself. The guys headed down to the beach— I told them I'd meet them there in a bit. I held off as long as I could but eventually, I did end up heading down to the water. It was a private beach, not too far of a walk from the chalet. I heard someone running behind me. I took a glance back and my face completely lit up when I saw her.
"WHAT ARE YOU DOING HERE!?" I tell excited.
The girl came with a speed so fast, we collided into a hug, catching ourselves so we were still standing.
"The guys told me you were back! I wanted to surprise you!" Raven explained.
"Oh my god I've missed you so much." I couldn't help but hug her again.
Raven and I were friends in elementary school and have stayed in contact ever since. We talk on the phone almost everyday and tell each other absolutely everything.
"So what's new babes?" The lighter brunette asks me.
"Not much ya know, getting drunk with the guys, watching them be psycho, accidentally sleeping with Lincoln, cleaning up after breakfast—" I got cut off faster that with a very loud gasp.
"YOU HAD SEX WITH LINCOLN?" She tells out for the whole entire world to here. My hand slaps over her face, luckily there was no one there but still. "RAVEN! SHHH!" I whisper with some tone. "Sorry! You had sex with Lincoln?!" She whispers now.
I sigh and shrug. "We were both super drunk. It was nothing." I tell her.
"Nothing my butt. You like him." She said and I frown turning towards her. "I do not."

                                ***

The weekend continued, it was slow and dreadful...for me at least. After my talk with Raven, we said goodbye, she had a busy day so she couldn't stay. I tried to ignore my thoughts but it didn't work. I tried to get involved with the boys but it just didn't seam fun. I stayed by myself most of the time, of course Bellamy always tried to include me, but I waved him off every time making sure he still had fun. Finally, Sunday night came and everyone was heading out.

"Bye guys, thank you so much for coming all the way." Monty spoke, and I could tell he truly meant it.
All the guys hugged us one by one. As my arms wrapped around each guy, I smiled and said goodbye but my mind was racing getting ready for Lincoln's hug. I was nervous for some reason—excited too honestly. Finally, he stood in front of me.
"O-" He said simply before giving me a hug. He was really tall compared to me, my cheek pressed perfectly against his chest as I hugged him too. I felt his chin touch the top of my head and then It was over... too soon I thought.
"Bye Linc-" I gave him a smile and then Bellamy joined me and we got into the taxi, our bags already in the trunk. We waved to the guys until we were out of sight.

I let out a long exhausted sigh and buckled up, tilting my head towards the window.
"Hey O. You alright? You seem... distracted... you did all weekend—I'm sorry if this was boring for you. I know it must've been. Stuck in a house full of boys—" he rambled on and I turned to him shaking my head with a smile.
"No no Bell. Don't be sorry. I had fun. Really. I'm just tired." I reassured him. "Okay.. good." He smiled.
"I'm happy we got to come back. It was nice seeing everyone." I nodded. "You should definitely invite them all to our house. Have they ever been to Florida?" I wondered.
"I'm not sure." He shrugged.
"Well, I like seeing you happy. So keep in touch with them... now, wake me up when we get to the airport." I told him with a cheeky smile and then leaned against his shoulder shutting my eyes, I must've fallen asleep pretty fast because the next thing I knew, we were at the airport.