(birthday special)
The love I had for him was so dear, most days it skips across my mind. It has been almost 5 years, yet I can't seem to disregard the fact he still exists. I still have a chance to talk with him or see his face.
4 years and 157 days ago, my boyfriend of 2 years broke up with me. We had undergone a slow process of becoming each other's pet peeves. I noticed as the days went on, I found more to ridicule him for, as he did me. Neither of us ever expressed our distaste, but the words floated through the air, seeping into the other's skin. There wasn't a force strong enough to stop the inevitable. One day, I snapped and screamed the words I had been dying to tell him while we drove down a dimly lit road to my home.
His face still haunts me when I told him I felt as if there was nothing left for us. He looked hurt yet relieved. My heart melted into my stomach as I watched his lips unwillingly curve downward as he begged his body not to cry. I had no such ability to restrain myself and tears streamed down my face, pooling at the collar of my shirt.
I hadn't been capable of love since. I had fell so completely, desperately, deeply in love with him. We were best friends as well as lovers, the sweetest kind of love. It feels like jumping from cloud to cloud, running from the world together. However, we were too young to understand with love comes hate. You have to be able to hate in order to love.
Now, we have gone 4 years and 157 days without talking and I am lost. I don't seem to be able to find home. I may live in a house and surround myself with loving people, but I don't have any life left inside me. I miss the way it felt to see his face as he walked up to my door to knock. There's nothing in this world I desire more than a simple hug from him. I wish to be wrapped in his arms as I am engulfed by his warmth.
But, I understand that if, for some miracle, we find our way back to each other, my world would be destroyed. We would end up just like the first time, resenting each other like no one else. I enjoy being able to remember him with beautiful moments. I don't want my mind to be filled with senarios in which I am sitting in the bathtub, tugging at my hair because sobbing doesn't express my sadness enough.
If you're reading this, Doyoung, I still love you, I always will. The moments I have spent with you have been the most beautiful of my life. I miss your smile, the sound of you laughing, the sparkle in your eyes more than I will ever be able to express. I still keep your blue hoodie in my closet, neatly folded in the back of the drawer I keep my pyjamas. I will never throw it away, for it is the single souvenir I have of our love.
Please, never come back.
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A/n
Ok so I need to stop writing sad stories; I know most of you guys are reading fanfics so you can be happy, and here I am.😂 Anywho, I hope you guys enjoyed this story, it's kind of late, but I've been doing things for school, so I haven't had time to write. I'm sure you guys don't care though, I don't really have a platform right now. 😬 Okay, sorry, thank you for reading, I really appreciate you supporting my writing, I promise I'll try to get better! ❤️
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nct short stories
FanfictionI hope you enjoy the short stories I write on here! I'll accept requests if you'd like to send me one. have a good time reading, thanks for giving me a shot!
