Complicated

Chapter 5

(A/N: Hey! Sorry about the tense change in this chapter. I tried to write in the present tense but it was quite hard for me, so I decided to settle with the past tense. Also, tell me in the comments if there's anything you'd like to see or any suggestions you have! Also, there's a picture of Ross above! Enjoy! -Leo)

They always tell me I'm different. An outcast. A shadow among bright, glowing beings that I yearn to someday be close to. I'm a small, useless comet flying through space. A comet, that, despite being noticed has nowhere to go. A comet, surrounded by large, beautiful planets, and yet, there is another who stands out.

He shines. He glows. He is above all else. He makes the planets seem as if they were only specks of dust. Ross.

I admire him. I adore him. And, yet, so do everyone else. So, then, what makes me so different? What separates me from the crowd? Is it my cold, offsetting demeanor? Is it the fact I smoke, only to watch the grey cloud swirl and puff? Or, is there no reason at all?

Am I really a planet, beautiful and valued, yet overthinking simple things? Underestimating himself? That, then, is my only true fault.

"Connor? Connor!" I jumped, hitting the back of my head on the headboard of my bed. It was from my father. I had gotten home earlier, around 3 pm. I looked at the analog clock hanging on our wall. 5 pm. I was laying on my neatly made bed, staring at the ceiling. For two hours.

I snapped back into reality. "Come get your cat! It's dragging dirt all through the house!" I nodded, getting up. "Right," I replied. My father looked a mess. His dirty blonde hair was greasy and unkempt, and he wore a loose, dirty white tank top along with old khaki pants. He wore white socks, one of them having a hole in them, paired with washed-out blue flip flops, that I guarantee he bought from the Dollar Tree a few miles away.

Just hold on, Connor. You've got your driver's license. You've got money. You've got your brain. You have a plan, and patience to be able to execute it correctly. Just wait. All you have to do is wait until you're 18 and you can leave. All you have to do is do good in school and save up money.

Maybe I could get a job at a gas station?

I could sneak my infamous packs of Marlboro Light (The shorter kind), and still earn money. I could unwrap the clear plastic, all while getting cash. I could admire the outer gold trimming, getting some dollars along the way. I could breathe the nicotine in and out, watch the smoke and--"Connor!" My father slapped the back of my head, hitting me with the ring he wore. "Get your cat!" He scolded me. "Yes, sir." I walked into our living room, seeing my tiny brown kitten. I named her Haruhi, and, although I would never admit it, I named her after Haruhi Fujioka, the main character in Ouran HighSchool Host Club.

I picked her up, stroking her dirty, messy fur. She could use a bath. I carried her into the hallway, grabbing a towel and walking into the bathroom. I closed the door behind me, slipping off my grey hoodie. I tossed it by the door and turned on the bathwater. I made sure it wasn't too cold, nor too hot. Suddenly, I froze. I don't have the right things to wash her with! I turned the bath off and tied my jacket around my waist, picking up Haruhi.

I set her on the floor of my bedroom, her food, water, litter box, and a few toys already in there. My father couldn't stand her, so I kept her for myself. My mother and I had gotten her mother on my 10th birthday, and about a year ago she had kittens, Haruhi being one of them. I begged my mother to let me keep one, and although reluctantly, she agreed.

She left 3 months later.

I wonder, was it Haruhi she didn't want, or me?