Short Stories

Because He Cares

"He only does this because he cares, you know that right?" I glance through puffy red eyes and sniffle. That's what she keeps telling me over and over, he cares, that's why he always yells to get his point across. I was so scared all the time, I wish I could just disappear.

"I don't know why you don't love yourself! Everyone else loves you! That's why you're anxious because you don't love yourself! It's because you don't care about yourself!" His face was contorted with anger as he yelled about me being anxious yesterday. I couldn't breathe, as he puts it I'm panicking. He plays it off like I'm JUST panicking, no, it's more than that. I can't breathe, I'm crying, I'm afraid. Not only am I afraid, I'm afraid of him.

Once he was finished yelling completely I went back to my room to put the mess of clothes away that I had started before my mom came in and made us have that conversation. I couldn't focus on the clothes though, my heart was still beating a million miles a minute and I was still having problems breathing.

I come back to the present and my mom is staring at me, waiting for an answer, "Of course I know that, it's just a lot." I look into her eyes and then look down, I hate lying to her but I can't show her how terrifying he is. She smiled and hugged me, she knew that I wasn't okay, but she refuses to see why.

As she left I finally got all my clothes put away and I started on my homework, just another distraction. I'm scared to go on my phone because he might come in and yell at me again.

When they called me for dinner I walked out to the dining room nervously. Throughout the whole dinner, he acted as if nothing bad had happened and was happy go lucky, I just kept quiet. When they left to go to their church thing I sat in the living room with my sister.

"Have you ever felt so guilty, that you don't eat just to punish yourself?" She looked at me like I was stupid, she proceeded to tell she hadn't and so I kept talking about my fear of him and my fear of everything. She told me I just needed to talk to him, but I can't.

When they got home later that night I was still sitting on the couch, but I quickly took my headphones out and put my phone away. I don't want to be caught on my phone after he had just yelled about everything and how I'm always on my phone and stuff.

-I don't really know where to go from here, sorry if you wanted to know more-